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A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment they both go to sleep, the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower. In the middle of the night the woman leans over, wakes the man and says, "I''m sorry to b...

A young couple on their wedding night were in their honeymoon suite. As they were undressing for bed, the husband, a big burly man, tossed his trousers to his new bride. He said, "Here, put these on." She put them on and the waist was twice the size of her body. "I can't wear your tro...

20. The hole closed on him before he could penetrate it. 19. He came at his blind side and got him from behind. 18. He's off to the sidelines for a quick blow. 17. It's a game of inches. 16. That hole was so big, you could drive a truck through it. 15. When you get down in this area, you just gotta ...

-It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting. -A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty. -If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps. -Most laptop computers are powerful enough to overrid...

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through le...

Three fans are walking to Fenway Park for the Red Sox-Yankees playoff series, when they see a foot sticking out of some bushes. An inspection revealed a dead-drunk naked woman. One man placed his Orioles baseball cap on her right breast. The Red Sox fan placed his cap on her left breast, and the Yan...

Two old guys, Abe and Sol, are sitting on a park bench feeding pigeons and talking about baseball, like they do every day. Abe turns to Sol and says, "Do you think there's baseball in heaven?" Sol thinks about it for a minute and replies, "I dunno. But let's make a deal: if I die firs...

I really hope he comes to TO again!!! I could sure see him twice this year!!!

comemonday wrote:Does anyone else LOVE that Disney commercial? That little boy is SO ADORABLE when he says... BUT WE'RE TOO EXCITED TO SLEEP! I just can't stop thinking of how f..ing cute he is!

This is my mom's favorite commercial!!! She thinks it's so cute!!!

Too many to list!!!

But I wanna hear Floridays!!!

....get all misty at the end of Trains, Planes and Automobiles? I think maybe I need to start my job or something, but at the end when Del Griffith and Neil Paige are walking up the street carrying Del's big suitcase it just gets ya right there.... Good stuff man... Good stuff.... Just how many tim...

This is quite possibly the greatest comedy ever... John Candy was amazing and died way before his time. He still makes me laugh, I have almost all his movies!!!

....get all misty at the end of Trains, Planes and Automobiles? I think maybe I need to start my job or something, but at the end when Del Griffith and Neil Paige are walking up the street carrying Del's big suitcase it just gets ya right there.... Good stuff man... Good stuff.... I do every time!!...

I'll be there!!!

SweetMelissa wrote:Tyler and I will be there!!!

I am sooooooooooo excited!!!

SweetMelissa wrote:Tyler and I will be there!!!

YAY!!!