What's in a Name

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Tiki Bar
Thank God the Tiki Torch Still Shines
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What's in a Name

Post by Tiki Bar »

I apologize if this is an old one...

This handsome man walks into an agent's office in Hollywood
and says "I want to be a movie-star." Tall, handsome and with
experience on Broadway.... he had all the right credentials.

The agent asked, "What's your name?"

The guy said "my name is Penis Van -------."

The agent said, "Sir, I hate to tell you, but in order to get into
Hollywood, you are gonna have to change your name."

"I will NOT change my name! The Van ------- name is centuries
old, I will not disrespect my grandfather by changing my name.
Not ever !" The agent said "Sir, I have worked in Hollywood for
years..... you will NEVER go far in Hollywood with a name like
Penis Van ------- !!

I'm telling you, you will HAVE TO change your name, or I will
not be able to represent you."

"So be it!! We will not do business together" the guy said....and
he left the agent's office.

FIVE YEARS LATER..... The agent opens an envelope sent to his
office. Inside the envelope is a letter and a check for $50,000. The
agent is awestruck....who would possibly send him $50,000? He
reads the letter enclosed......

"Dear Sir,

Five years ago, I came into your office wanting to become an actor
in Hollywood. You told me I needed to change my name. I was
determined to make it with my God-given birth name, I refused.
You told me I would never make it in Hollywood with a name like
Penis Van -------.

After I left your office, I thought about what you said. I decided you
were right. I had to change my name. I had too much pride to return
to your office, so I signed with another agent.

I would never have made it without changing my name, so the
enclosed check is a token of my appreciation. Thank you for your


Dick Van Dyke
You’re still grinning, we’re still winning, nothing left to say
I’m still gliding as I go flying down this endless wave

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