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10. He's jolly enough without getting narc'd.
9. Still mourning the mysterious disappearance of his dive buddy, Frosty the Snowman, while diving in the Bahamas.
8. He hates it when his dry suit leaks and his fuzzy red woolies get wet.
7. Rudolph's nose shorts out under water.
6. His sleigh failed Marine and Harbour inspections.
5. He's nervous because great white sharks have made the "naughty" list for 25 years running.
4. Wet suits not available in "jolly old elf" sizes.
3. That big white beard makes it impossible to get a good seal on his mask.
2. Have you tried to get 32 fins on little reindeer feet?
1. His elf-produced wooden regulator is dangerous at any depth!






