So why did you bother to get married then?

[buffettbride]

Conversely, I had 2 kids and then got married.

So... Why did you bother to get married then?
Sorry, someone had to say it.... J/K

Sy, I would say "To formalize our lifelong committment to each other. What are you saying, that YOU only got married because you were having children??? I'm sorry you don't feel as committed to your spouse as I do (to mine)!"

Now that's just priceless I love it!

I'm glad you liked it... Too bad I never think up things like that until an hour after the rude comment.

I'm the worst at that. I totally have the perfect comebacks a day late and a dollar short.

Not you! I'd have thought you'd be the Comeback Queen!
You do pretty good on Buffett News.

Haha. Thanks. It's taken practice. I'll have a comeback, but then I think later of an even *better* one!

[Karin]

Some people. .

These are the same people that ask. . "Why aren't you married yet?"

"Yeah. . Why aren't you thin?"

"Financially it made more sense to file a joint return than a separate return"

"Because a husband and a child would be redundant"

[buffettbride]

"Because a husband and a child would be redundant"

Touche.

[carolinagirl]

Some people. .

These are the same people that ask. . "Why aren't you married yet?"

"Yeah. . Why aren't you thin?"

I like that one!

[sy]

"Because a husband and a child would be redundant"

How very true!

[Sam]

HMMMMM I agree it it is rude! I have had people, ask me why I am not married yet or have any kids......my usual reply is because I haven't met anyone that loves me as much as I do and I always wrap my rascle....but am willing to make an exception for them.... and smile at them..usually shuts them up.

Notice all are open for modification.....to fit the situation....and feel free to get creative...

We haven't gotten to that page of the Kama Sutra as of yet....

I have seen this one work before at least once, with a good lady friend...when asked about not having kids. She "burst into tears" and turned away / walk away crying....
OR:
Why should we screw up a nice relationship?
OR:
Try this "You mean you don't know??? Then I am not going to/cannot tell you or discuss it any further with you.

The Direct approach:

Get REALLY LOUD.....
WE JUST DON'T WANT TO HAVE KIDS AT THIS TIME!!! DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT??? ( possible addendum.... Since you are partially deaf ( no fun being made of your situation at all...) You could try "NO I WILL NOT HAVE A BABY FOR YOU!!!" and storm off...to find another libation....
(Notice>>> think of the possible variations and feel free to add to, and be creative as you think you should/need to be....
Should work wonders in a large group of people or in public places...on nosey people who should know better....usually they will be embarassed by being made the topic of conversation....and will often look like a fish out of water and try to figure out just what the BLEEP happened...

If they have any comeback to that, possibly ask them when they are going to have their next kid... ( get into details such as what day of conception , what was going on at the time( besides the obvious) music playing, birds singing , what sheets were on the bed..... were they on the kitchen table, what they had for breakfast , lunch, supper, that day, etc, etc,... were they looking up at the ceiling deciding what color to paint it? etc.,etc, etc, and whatever....baffle their brains with BS ) then you can tell them nevermind ..you don't care to know and walk away...to another conversation or bathroom or whatever...or tell thm OH REALLY ??LIKE WOW !!! I think that is Stalin's/Hitler's (WHOEVER) Birthday or Isn't that is the same date that Pol Pot or the Tsusis and Hutus started genocide? Etc.....

Naive and innocent:
We don't know how to have children.....would you please be kind enough to show us???
All we know is how puppies are made.....

However there are the conspiracy things usually work great too...

I am an abductee and the aliens stole all of my eggs....

Ask if the person has a Top Secret clearence and is cleared for ( pick anyword) and if they are not, state that you cannot talk about it...... ( be surprized how many will fall for that as it is useful in alot of different ways...they might bug you a bit just tell them you don't know what they are talking about and to be quiet or else they might get them and your children killed.

If they want to pursuit the matter to look (whatever word you used) up on the internet and to file a Freedom of Information Act under ( whatever word you used)...but you have really said to much already and will deny you said anything if anyone ever asks about the conversation.....

Sit back and wait and keep your ears open.....and say nothing about the conversation...or if some one ask you about it....just say I have no idea where they got that info and play innocent.

OR:

Well after seeing your children, we didn't want kids. Have you considered marketing their behavior as a reason for proper use of birthcontrol? Just think how many teen pregnancies would be prevented if you were do to so! So we decicided to have puppies/kittens/whatever instead and they were ALOT less painful....

As you noticed most people that are seemingly unhappy try to get their friends pared off so they can have someone as equally as unhappy as they are....or something.....
OR:
Actually I have many numerous children, just I have never given actual birth to any of them thanks to technology and harvesting of eggs and donation... there are many happy mothers out there......

Anyway .. while your mind is wondering ...let it contemplate on variations of everything everyone has said and let it creative and come up with your own.....don't say you can't.....I know that you can do it....look at them as aputer problem you need to solve....you are a creative person...obviously!

[phjrsaunt]

"Because a husband and a child would be redundant"

Touche.

[LaTda]

wow, you damn dinks are pretty uptight
to react like that when someone engages you in conversation &
asks a simple question about human nature when you are married &
where the next logical step, according to most religions, is to go forth & have children...
just friggin admit it to people & say we are selfish & don't want any..
what part of human nature don't you get FCOL

here, take a lick

[ragtopW]

"Because a husband and a child would be redundant"

Touche.

I still love that Ad that says

for your ten year old son




and your ten year old Husband



as it shows a water fight on the lawn..

[Sidew13]

"Because a husband and a child would be redundant"

HEY
I resemble that remark

[RinglingRingling]

"Because a husband and a child would be redundant"

HEY
I resemble that remark

but they trust you with credit cards...

[sy]

wow, you damn dinks are pretty uptight
to react like that when someone engages you in conversation &
asks a simple question about human nature when you are married &
where the next logical step, according to most religions, is to go forth & have children...
just friggin admit it to people & say we are selfish & don't want any..
what part of human nature don't you get FCOL

While that is the actual truth, it's just the matter of the question itself. They aren't people who know me very well (except for the family members, and I guess it just comes with the territory), and for all they know, there are medical reasons, or that I've tried, or maybe miscarried, etc. There's just certain questions you don't ask as though you're asking how the weather is outside.

Now when I get that question again, I will always think of this thread and not get my blood pressure so high ...plus I have some good comebacks

and Sam, I loved yours....they were priceless.

[carolinagirl]

Okay, if and when the next logical step DOES happen, and you
happen to be pregnant, HERE'S the question I hated the most:

When are you due?

Everybody seems to think it's the only thing they can say to a pregnant
person, that she no longer is interested in "Do you think it might rain?"
or "Is it hot outside?"

Every checkout person asks that question and never pays attention to the
answer. I mean, at least pretend that you have a reason for asking me...
I got so sick of that question, especially when I was walking around
forgetting I was even pregnant, and I'd almost say "What, I just paid you.
When is what due?"

The kicker was after my son was born, and I still had a tummy, and a
check-out girl dared to say, "When is the baby due?" I was like, the BABY
is right here, you MORON!

I didn't say that, but I did look at the baby and look at her and say "Well,
I just bought this dress here in JCPenney; I guess I'm not going to wear it
any more if it makes me look like I'm still expecting!"

[Sam]

wow, you damn dinks are pretty uptight
to react like that when someone engages you in conversation &
asks a simple question about human nature when you are married &
where the next logical step, according to most religions, is to go forth & have children...
just friggin admit it to people & say we are selfish & don't want any..
what part of human nature don't you get FCOL

While that is the actual truth, it's just the matter of the question itself. They aren't people who know me very well (except for the family members, and I guess it just comes with the territory), and for all they know, there are medical reasons, or that I've tried, or maybe miscarried, etc. There's just certain questions you don't ask as though you're asking how the weather is outside.

Now when I get that question again, I will always think of this thread and not get my blood pressure so high ...plus I have some good comebacks

and Sam, I loved yours....they were priceless.

Mike brought a very good point about religion....You can always say that you don't "prescibe" to that particular religion......and that you believe that humans are nothing but a virus infecting the planet Earth....murdering...trees...animals...wetlands...insects...rainforests...atmosphere...oceans....whatever.......etc, etc.... ( why not it works for the other breed of PETA and I don't mean the one the one of People Eat Tasty Animals...... MUHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

GOOD!!! I hope they can be of at least "some use" to you and your hubby! If you ever actually use any of them...........PLEASE let me know....I would love to know how it goes/went....some should reactions should prove at least "moderately" interesting....

Hopefully you and hubby (and others) can get a very good laugh and a little "payback" at or out of, the rude person's expense, and make them think before they ask someone else such a question.....

Best of luck!
Sam

[Sam]

Okay, if and when the next logical step DOES happen, and you
happen to be pregnant, HERE'S the question I hated the most:

When are you due?

Everybody seems to think it's the only thing they can say to a pregnant
person, that she no longer is interested in "Do you think it might rain?"
or "Is it hot outside?"

Every checkout person asks that question and never pays attention to the
answer. I mean, at least pretend that you have a reason for asking me...
I got so sick of that question, especially when I was walking around
forgetting I was even pregnant, and I'd almost say "What, I just paid you.
When is what due?"

The kicker was after my son was born, and I still had a tummy, and a
check-out girl dared to say, "When is the baby due?" I was like, the BABY
is right here, you MORON!

I didn't say that, but I did look at the baby and look at her and say "Well,
I just bought this dress here in JCPenney; I guess I'm not going to wear it
any more if it makes me look like I'm still expecting!"

Hmmmmmm you could have said something along the lines, that they are twins, triplets,(whatever) and I had the one you see here two weeks ( whatever) ago and the next one is due a week from Tuesday and the next one a week from next Friday.......( or whatever...) Just a thought....

[Prthd119]

My sister said " I am done making the baby...Now I am just making baby fat"