Out of the mouths of babes...

[SMLCHNG]

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl
whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in
white?" "Because white is the color of happiness, and
today is the happiest day of her life." The child
thought about this for a moment, then said, "So why is
the groom wearing black?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their
fathers. The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few
words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they
give him $50. The second boy says, "That's nothing. My
Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he
calls it a song, they give him $100." The third boy
says, "I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few
words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and
it takes eight people to collect all the money!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~

An elderly woman died last month. Having never
married, she requested no male pallbearers. In her
handwritten instructions for her memorial service, she
wrote, "They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I
don't want them to take me out when I'm dead."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What
would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?" He
answered "Call for backup."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and
Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem. A small child
replied: "They couldn't get a baby sitter."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten
Commandments with her five and six year olds. After
explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and
thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that
teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy answered, "Thou
shall not kill."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

At Sunday School they were teaching how God created
everything, including human beings. Little Johnny
seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve
was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the
week his mother noticed him lying down as though he
were ill, and she said, "Johnny, what is the matter?"
Little Johnny responded, "I have pain in my side. I
think I'm going to have a wife."

~~~~~~~~~~~

Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after
hearing a strong preaching on the devil. One said to
the other, "What do you think about all this Satan
stuff?" The other boy replied, "Well, you know how
Santa Claus turned out. It's probably just your Dad.

~~~~~~~~~~

[ladyparrothead]

[ragtopW]

[jimolliemom]

Too Funny! Kids DO say the darndest stuff!

[Dally]

[HB-COWBOY]