This Week + Horoscopes..
Posted: November 15, 2006 11:09 am
At BG's request....(Ok...I forgot...she asked me weeks ago to start posting this guys horoscopes... 
)
Here you go:
FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning November 16
Copyright 2006 by Rob Brezsny
http://www.freewillastrology.com
Grammar key: Asterisks equal *italics*
ARIES (March 21-April 19): Recently uncovered evidence
(http://tinyurl.com/gz865) seems to confirm the argument that
Christopher Columbus was a cruel, stupid tyrant who paved the way for
the genocide of Native Americans. But that's not the part of his story I
want to bring to your attention right now, Aries. Rather, I'd like you to
meditate on the wisdom of the bumper sticker I just saw: "Columbus did
not know where he was going. When he got back, he didn't know where
he had been. But he had a great adventure. And he did it all on borrowed
money. There's hope for all of us." Given your current astrological omens,
there's substantial hope for you to pull off a feat comparable to the one
the bumper sticker describes.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): "Dear Love Doctor: Please send a divine slap
upside the head to the clueless guy I'm in a half-assed relationship with.
He's GOT to wake up to the fact that it's high time to let someone,
namely me, shower him with love. I mean, all the magic's in place. With
just a flick of his attitude, he could materialize me whipping up gourmet
Cajun cuisine in his new kitchen--not to mention spicing up every other
room in his house. Love Doctor, please cast a spell to get him in
alignment with cosmic necessity. -Overripe Taurus." Dear Overripe: I
appreciate the ability you Bulls have right now to envision the best and
brightest possibilities for your relationships. However, it's crucial that you
give everyone the freedom to bumble along, even if it means that for now
they'll be out of sync with the wonders you can imagine.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): The last few drops remaining in your chalice will
soon evaporate. Your luxurious indoor swimming pool (you know, the one
in your fantasies) has barely enough water left in it to give a water bug
traction. And you haven't reached out your arms and cupped your hands
in a gesture of feisty anticipation for far too long. So what are you going
to do about it all, Gemini? Here's what I suggest: FILL 'ER UP! (P.S. The
gas tank of the flying car you sometimes take for a spin in your dreams is
also on empty.)
CANCER (June 21-July 22): Pay close attention to how your immediate
past impacts the present. Just as the food you ate in the previous two
days plays a large role in determining your physical energy today, your
current mood has been shaped by the psychic environment you've been
creating for yourself recently. Here's the really cool thing: You always
have a choice. You can decide to fuel yourself with unhealthy food,
mediocre fantasies, and petty emotions, or you can scrupulously insist on
high-class, first-rate stuff that will make you feel good.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In his book *Thumbsucker,* Walter Kirn explores
the tension between security and passion. We all yearn to feel safe, he
says, and yet we also need to express our native wildness, which is crucial
in giving us a visceral sense of being ourselves. If we put too much
emphasis on being careful, we squelch our primal urge for unpredictability
and lose touch with our need to play. According to my analysis of the
omens, Leo, you're at the end of a phase when caution and self-
preservation have made sense. Don't wait too much longer before you
put your ass on the line in search of too much fun.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The Delaware Gap National Recreation Area in
Pennsylvania has an outhouse that cost $333,000 to build. It's a two-hole
beauty with a roof constructed from slate mined in Vermont, porch
railings built out of Indiana limestone, and an indestructible cobblestone
foundation. This is your symbol of power for the coming week, Virgo. May
it inspire you to devote elegant, sumptuous attention to one of your
most basic needs.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): The film *The Englishman Who Went Up The Hill
But Came Down A Mountain* is set in Wales in 1917. Two English
cartographers arrive in a small town to evaluate whether the local peak is
really high enough to be officially defined as a mountain. To the villagers'
consternation, their beloved landmark is found to be less than the
regulation 1,000 feet--a mere hill--and that prompts them to take action.
With painstaking determination, they haul buckets of dirt from their
gardens all the way to the top, hoping to raise it high enough to exceed
the standard. This scenario is comparable to a challenge I hope you'll take
on, Libra. Please do whatever's necessary to ensure your hill is actually a
mountain.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): You were standing in the doorway with your
crooked smile as big and wild as the morning light. I was spellbound--lost
all memory of who I'd been before that moment. You were as shockingly
real as the perfect giant spider web stretched across my front porch
when I left my house today. Did I hallucinate what you said as you
murmured into your cell phone? Or did you really say, "I'm looking for
someone who'll teach me how to live forever as we make love with
exploding hearts"? That was too sweet and fierce to bear. So here's my
loving complaint, which is also my bragging promise: I want you so much I
want to be you. I adore you with such painful lucidity that I think I could
learn how to find you in every bird's cry, every cloud's flow, every
changing face.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): A storm has been stirring up your inner
world. Tune into it now. Feel its blustering squall. Bow down to its
pummeling howl. Let your awe and amazement rise as you contemplate
how much power it has had to disturb you. Feel gratitude for all the ways
it has forced you to become tougher and cagier. Now imagine that the
storm is beginning to dissipate. Sense it slowly but surely losing its force,
spending its last fury. Soon it will have evolved into a misty drizzle.
Tomorrow morning, I bet you will awaken filled with the relaxed clarity
that comes after having great sex.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): "It was so much easier when I was cruel,"
mourns Elvis Costello in his song "When I Was Cruel." Writing about the
aching protectiveness she feels toward her precious son Sam in her book
*Operating Instructions,* Anne Lamott expresses a related gripe: "I feel
that he has completely ruined my life, because I just didn't used to care
all that much." A similar predicament may soon visit you, Capricorn.
Thanks to several close encounters with other people's pain, you may
swell up with compassion and empathy. Will you get soft and weak like
Costello and Lamott? According to my reading of the omens, you won't.
On the contrary, I think you'll become stronger and smarter.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Goose bumps and burning sensations
coursed through me as I meditated on your upcoming adventures. From
what I can tell, your rambles will be both spooky and fulfilling. They'll
knock you on your ass and lift your spirits, sometimes at the same time.
They'll give you almost more blessings than you can handle, even as they
invite you to take on responsibilities that will give you the chance to be a
hero. Are you ready to have your certainties challenged in the most useful
ways possible?
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): A cat doesn't usually catch a mouse on its
first pounce. On average, the kill takes three pounces. I hope this fun fact
inspires you to avoid the temptation to prematurely retire from your
hunt. It's true that the treasure you're pursuing has eluded you beyond
the time you thought you would have gotten it. It's also true that the
frustration you're feeling threatens to dilute the intense concentration
you need to complete the quest. But now that you've read my
exhortation, maybe you'll see that you're closer to capturing the prize
than you realize; maybe you'll marshal your energy and prime yourself to
pounce as many more times as it'll take.
)Here you go:
FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning November 16
Copyright 2006 by Rob Brezsny
http://www.freewillastrology.com
Grammar key: Asterisks equal *italics*
ARIES (March 21-April 19): Recently uncovered evidence
(http://tinyurl.com/gz865) seems to confirm the argument that
Christopher Columbus was a cruel, stupid tyrant who paved the way for
the genocide of Native Americans. But that's not the part of his story I
want to bring to your attention right now, Aries. Rather, I'd like you to
meditate on the wisdom of the bumper sticker I just saw: "Columbus did
not know where he was going. When he got back, he didn't know where
he had been. But he had a great adventure. And he did it all on borrowed
money. There's hope for all of us." Given your current astrological omens,
there's substantial hope for you to pull off a feat comparable to the one
the bumper sticker describes.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): "Dear Love Doctor: Please send a divine slap
upside the head to the clueless guy I'm in a half-assed relationship with.
He's GOT to wake up to the fact that it's high time to let someone,
namely me, shower him with love. I mean, all the magic's in place. With
just a flick of his attitude, he could materialize me whipping up gourmet
Cajun cuisine in his new kitchen--not to mention spicing up every other
room in his house. Love Doctor, please cast a spell to get him in
alignment with cosmic necessity. -Overripe Taurus." Dear Overripe: I
appreciate the ability you Bulls have right now to envision the best and
brightest possibilities for your relationships. However, it's crucial that you
give everyone the freedom to bumble along, even if it means that for now
they'll be out of sync with the wonders you can imagine.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): The last few drops remaining in your chalice will
soon evaporate. Your luxurious indoor swimming pool (you know, the one
in your fantasies) has barely enough water left in it to give a water bug
traction. And you haven't reached out your arms and cupped your hands
in a gesture of feisty anticipation for far too long. So what are you going
to do about it all, Gemini? Here's what I suggest: FILL 'ER UP! (P.S. The
gas tank of the flying car you sometimes take for a spin in your dreams is
also on empty.)
CANCER (June 21-July 22): Pay close attention to how your immediate
past impacts the present. Just as the food you ate in the previous two
days plays a large role in determining your physical energy today, your
current mood has been shaped by the psychic environment you've been
creating for yourself recently. Here's the really cool thing: You always
have a choice. You can decide to fuel yourself with unhealthy food,
mediocre fantasies, and petty emotions, or you can scrupulously insist on
high-class, first-rate stuff that will make you feel good.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In his book *Thumbsucker,* Walter Kirn explores
the tension between security and passion. We all yearn to feel safe, he
says, and yet we also need to express our native wildness, which is crucial
in giving us a visceral sense of being ourselves. If we put too much
emphasis on being careful, we squelch our primal urge for unpredictability
and lose touch with our need to play. According to my analysis of the
omens, Leo, you're at the end of a phase when caution and self-
preservation have made sense. Don't wait too much longer before you
put your ass on the line in search of too much fun.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The Delaware Gap National Recreation Area in
Pennsylvania has an outhouse that cost $333,000 to build. It's a two-hole
beauty with a roof constructed from slate mined in Vermont, porch
railings built out of Indiana limestone, and an indestructible cobblestone
foundation. This is your symbol of power for the coming week, Virgo. May
it inspire you to devote elegant, sumptuous attention to one of your
most basic needs.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): The film *The Englishman Who Went Up The Hill
But Came Down A Mountain* is set in Wales in 1917. Two English
cartographers arrive in a small town to evaluate whether the local peak is
really high enough to be officially defined as a mountain. To the villagers'
consternation, their beloved landmark is found to be less than the
regulation 1,000 feet--a mere hill--and that prompts them to take action.
With painstaking determination, they haul buckets of dirt from their
gardens all the way to the top, hoping to raise it high enough to exceed
the standard. This scenario is comparable to a challenge I hope you'll take
on, Libra. Please do whatever's necessary to ensure your hill is actually a
mountain.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): You were standing in the doorway with your
crooked smile as big and wild as the morning light. I was spellbound--lost
all memory of who I'd been before that moment. You were as shockingly
real as the perfect giant spider web stretched across my front porch
when I left my house today. Did I hallucinate what you said as you
murmured into your cell phone? Or did you really say, "I'm looking for
someone who'll teach me how to live forever as we make love with
exploding hearts"? That was too sweet and fierce to bear. So here's my
loving complaint, which is also my bragging promise: I want you so much I
want to be you. I adore you with such painful lucidity that I think I could
learn how to find you in every bird's cry, every cloud's flow, every
changing face.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): A storm has been stirring up your inner
world. Tune into it now. Feel its blustering squall. Bow down to its
pummeling howl. Let your awe and amazement rise as you contemplate
how much power it has had to disturb you. Feel gratitude for all the ways
it has forced you to become tougher and cagier. Now imagine that the
storm is beginning to dissipate. Sense it slowly but surely losing its force,
spending its last fury. Soon it will have evolved into a misty drizzle.
Tomorrow morning, I bet you will awaken filled with the relaxed clarity
that comes after having great sex.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): "It was so much easier when I was cruel,"
mourns Elvis Costello in his song "When I Was Cruel." Writing about the
aching protectiveness she feels toward her precious son Sam in her book
*Operating Instructions,* Anne Lamott expresses a related gripe: "I feel
that he has completely ruined my life, because I just didn't used to care
all that much." A similar predicament may soon visit you, Capricorn.
Thanks to several close encounters with other people's pain, you may
swell up with compassion and empathy. Will you get soft and weak like
Costello and Lamott? According to my reading of the omens, you won't.
On the contrary, I think you'll become stronger and smarter.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Goose bumps and burning sensations
coursed through me as I meditated on your upcoming adventures. From
what I can tell, your rambles will be both spooky and fulfilling. They'll
knock you on your ass and lift your spirits, sometimes at the same time.
They'll give you almost more blessings than you can handle, even as they
invite you to take on responsibilities that will give you the chance to be a
hero. Are you ready to have your certainties challenged in the most useful
ways possible?
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): A cat doesn't usually catch a mouse on its
first pounce. On average, the kill takes three pounces. I hope this fun fact
inspires you to avoid the temptation to prematurely retire from your
hunt. It's true that the treasure you're pursuing has eluded you beyond
the time you thought you would have gotten it. It's also true that the
frustration you're feeling threatens to dilute the intense concentration
you need to complete the quest. But now that you've read my
exhortation, maybe you'll see that you're closer to capturing the prize
than you realize; maybe you'll marshal your energy and prime yourself to
pounce as many more times as it'll take.
