R.I.P. Margaritaville

chippewa · Post by **chippewa** » April 7, 2007 2:20 pm

Margaritaville, 1977-2007,

passed quietly, making noise after a long run in the Buffett News March Madness Tournament. Conceived in the Florida Keys, Rita, as she was known by friends, stayed there all season with her life partner, Jimmy Buffett. Some people claimed there was a woman to blame, but the Monroe County Coroner has listed the official cause of death as "nobody's fault".

Together, Rita and Mr. Buffett traveled extensively, visiting such places as Great Woods, Riverbend Music Center and, most recently, Anguilla. Sadly, her dream of seeing Boise in her lifetime will go unfulfilled. She delighted in strumming her six-string on her front porch swing, while watching old men in tank tops cruise the gift shops. Rita also had a tattoo, a Mexican cutie, many years before their recent surge in popularity.

Rita had several loves in her life: She enjoyed sailing on Boats, walking on Beaches, drinking in Bars and singing Ballads. Tequila played an important part in her life, some say even 50 to 60 percent. Once, after breaking a flip-flop on a late-night walk home, she cut her heel on a discarded pop top. The laceration might have become infected, but tequila was applied to the wound and quickly healed. Rita's close friend Mr. Utley joked that, "about one ounce was poured on the cut. The rest of the bottle was applied internally." The event left such an impression that she later bottled and sold tequila under her own label. Rita also broke her leg twice, but she always insisted that these were not tequila-related incidents.

Food played a big part in Rita's life, as she and Jimmy became partners in a restaurant chain bearing her name. Some of her menu favorites included boiled shrimp and sponge cake. In her final days, Rita developed an affection for various frozen concoctions which helped her hang on, hang on, hang on. Her love of great food caused some problems, however, as she always dreamed about weight loss. Close friends also worried about her high blood pressure, and they took great pains in hiding her shaker of salt.

Margaritaville is survived by one Son of a Son of a Sailor, and a Pirate, 40. Memorial services will Come Monday at that One Particular Harbour.

phjrsaunt · Post by **phjrsaunt** » April 7, 2007 2:31 pm

daggone, but we have some clever people at BuffettNews!!

I enjoyed the HECK out of reading that, and I didn't even play in the tournament!

Post by **SMLCHNG** » April 7, 2007 2:33 pm

Damn funny!!!!!!

IrishPirate · Post by **IrishPirate** » April 7, 2007 3:11 pm

Sail on, Margaritaville

Brown Eyed Girl · Post by **Brown Eyed Girl** » April 7, 2007 3:27 pm

Damb, that was funny! Great job, Scott!

alphabits · Post by **alphabits** » April 7, 2007 4:11 pm

Chip, that was freakin' hilarious!

I give it an:

flipflopgirl · Post by **flipflopgirl** » April 7, 2007 4:22 pm

alphabits wrote:Chip, that was freakin' hilarious!

I give it an:

I was not sure that was an A! it looked like a butt to me!

habourgirl · Post by **habourgirl** » April 7, 2007 4:24 pm

That was awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

caly · Post by **caly** » April 7, 2007 4:35 pm

Okay.....you have way too much time on your hands

That is absolutely amazing. Why are you wasting your time hanging with a bunch of of BNers like us?
Oh, probably cause we get it

bravedave · Post by **bravedave** » April 7, 2007 4:41 pm

Nicely done, Chip.

PackPhanGirl · Post by **PackPhanGirl** » April 7, 2007 4:50 pm

alphabits · Post by **alphabits** » April 7, 2007 5:03 pm

flipflopgirl wrote:
alphabits wrote:Chip, that was freakin' hilarious!

I give it an:

I was not sure that was an A! it looked like a butt to me!

You must get some really peculiar lookin' people in that ER.

flipflopgirl · Post by **flipflopgirl** » April 7, 2007 5:13 pm

alphabits wrote:
flipflopgirl wrote:
alphabits wrote:Chip, that was freakin' hilarious!

I give it an:

I was not sure that was an A! it looked like a butt to me!
You must get some really peculiar lookin' people in that ER.

YUP!

and it is GREAT Chip!

unclejohn · Post by **unclejohn** » April 7, 2007 6:39 pm

nice job

myke212 · Post by **myke212** » April 7, 2007 6:44 pm

Nicley Done!

Jollymom21 · Post by **Jollymom21** » April 7, 2007 7:43 pm

caly wrote:Okay.....you have way too much time on your hands

That is absolutely amazing. Why are you wasting your time hanging with a bunch of of BNers like us?
Oh, probably cause we get it

Ditto

Great job!!

jbfinscj · Post by **jbfinscj** » April 7, 2007 7:44 pm

WOW

dnw · Post by **dnw** » April 7, 2007 7:53 pm

Great job, chippewa!

Dezdmona · Post by **Dezdmona** » April 7, 2007 7:58 pm

That is truly one of the saddest things I've ever read....

....I think I may have to go fire up the blender and drink a toast to the deceased...I'm sorry, I don't know if I can go on......

job41475 · Post by **job41475** » April 7, 2007 8:20 pm

WOW Great stuff!!!!!!!!!