seminolegrl06 wrote:ph4ever wrote:
so if you've got a friend that's continually having relationships with married men and then is devastated when they don't leave their wives you're the type of friend that won't say squat. OK that's the way you are.
As far as me being blinded and jaded by my age - oh you poor thing, bless your heart.
being supportive of when she calls you at 2 am crying is one thing. Pointing out that maybe there might be pattern is one thing. Telling her what to do is quite another.
Things are slightly different now a days. I know this situtaion where he did leave his wife. Actually two situations like that. So what am I supposed to tell my friends? it could never happen to them? Maybe this married guy "settled" (like you feel so many people are these days) and he likes my friend. Either way, if he is divorced and giving it a shot with her, who am I to tell her not to try to? I mean he gave up a lot because he felt it was something worth trying for.
But I should say children are not in the mix. (he did not have any yet)
I just have to say things are different now a days. There are girls who are "settle" for the MRS lifestyle.
I will always be supportive of my firends. Friends are the family you choose. But I am not their mother, it is not my job to tell them what to do or scold them for doing something I wouldn't do.
like I said, years have not jaded me. Casual relationships, casual sex, its amazing to get a guy to stop sleeping around. And unlike the past its out there in the open. So a girl find a guy that just wants to stop for a moment and hangout with them, they want to figure out why. He may not be perfect, but he wants to give her an earnest chance why not go for it?
Jumping from relationship to relationship has its benefits, sometimes you figure out what you don't want from people.
I have the chronic relationship friend. I really do. But there is nothing to say to her. She admits that she needs to be in a relationship. So the only thing left for me to do, is love her for who she is because thats what she does for me.
People don't change. Either love them for who they are and have them in your life (friends, guy friends, or boyfriends and husbands) or be done with them. You cannot teach someone your "mistakes" and sometimes people need their own learning process to figure it out.
So I guess you are the lecturer friend who no one really talks to anymore because you are so disapproving. Thats ok be a friend like that.
how sad that you are so narrow minded and such an authority on life at such a young age
Tell me - how many friends have you burried?
Ever hugged a friend dieing of AIDS goodbye telling him he shouldn't be sorry for his lifestyle? and that's the last time you talk cause they die?
Ever had a friend commit suicide?
Ever have a friend murdered?
Ever even work with people with a terminal disease, or the homeless?
Do you still have parents alive?
have you lost your child?
so maybe in your eyes I'm jaded - but at least I'm jaded towards the right things, for example healthcare, or people that are in a vicious negative cycle. As far as telling people how to live their lives - oh please. I can guarantee I've got a wider demographic of friends than you do. Ever gone down to the bad parts of town to share a 40 with the homeless guys on the street corner and take them a bucket of chicken? You probably wouldn't condensend yourself.
But one thing I'm not jaded about. Or maybe it's an act of respect. I do know and understand that I can learn a lot from those that are older than me and I'm not a know it all that thinks I speak for anyone other than myself.
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"While the rest of the species is descended from apes, redheads are descended from cats." Mark Twain
