30 Things That You Will Never Hear A Southern Boy Say

Post by **SMLCHNG** » August 23, 2007 8:40 pm

30. Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen.
29. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.
28. Duct tape won't fix that.
27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.
26. We don't keep firearms in this house.
25. You can't feed that to the dog.
24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not
safe.
23. Wrestling is fake.
22. We're vegetarians.
21. Do you think my gut is too big?
20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of
biscuits and gravy.
19. Honey, we don't need another dog.
18. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War?
17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
14. Trim the fat off that steak.
13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
12. The tires on that truck are too big.
11. I've got it all on the C: DRIVE.
10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.
09. My fiancé, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
08. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
07. Checkmate.
06. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.
05. Hey, here's an episode of 'Hee Haw' that we
haven't seen.
04. I don't have a favorite college team.
03. You Guys.
02. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Betty
Mae.

AND THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A
SOUTHERN BOY SAY:

01. Nope, no more for me. I'm driving

springparrot · Post by **springparrot** » August 23, 2007 8:41 pm

You've lived in the south, haven't you

unclejohn · Post by **unclejohn** » August 23, 2007 8:53 pm

freaky4tiki · Post by **freaky4tiki** » August 23, 2007 9:25 pm

SchoolGirlHeart · Post by **SchoolGirlHeart** » August 23, 2007 9:28 pm

OMG, that nails it!!!!!!!!

Post by **SMLCHNG** » August 23, 2007 9:29 pm

springparrot wrote:You've lived in the south, haven't you

Uhhhh.. only if the south side of Chicago or Denver area counts

ragtopW · Post by **ragtopW** » August 23, 2007 10:43 pm

ragtopW · Post by **ragtopW** » August 23, 2007 10:44 pm

drunkpirate66 · Post by **drunkpirate66** » August 23, 2007 11:40 pm

perfect!

britparrothead · Post by **britparrothead** » August 24, 2007 10:23 am

RinglingRingling · Post by **RinglingRingling** » August 24, 2007 10:25 am

strangely enough... I can hear Cletus trying to say those things...

and then bursting something important laughing at the end of the recitation.

CapnK · Post by **CapnK** » August 24, 2007 11:01 am

jonesbeach10 · Post by **jonesbeach10** » August 24, 2007 11:56 am

SMLCHNG wrote: 22. We're vegetarians.
20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of
biscuits and gravy.

I actually met someone today from Georgia who was a vegetarian.

He's author Mike Tidwell, check him out...

dawgfan · Post by **dawgfan** » August 24, 2007 12:03 pm

HMM, maybe I should be offeded

but 29 of 30 fit me

txaggirl91 · Post by **txaggirl91** » August 24, 2007 12:09 pm

what about "i really don't like nascar"

Wino you know · Post by **Wino you know** » August 24, 2007 12:41 pm

springparrot wrote:You've lived in the south, haven't you

HUH? You talkin' to me?

Yes, I have. Macon, GA (1988-89) & Memphis, TN (1989-1996).

One thing I'VE never heard a southerner say-
"Could you please get me a knife & fork so I can eat my fried chicken/pizza"

now that's pure blasphemy!

Conolulu · Post by **Conolulu** » August 24, 2007 1:27 pm

Wino you know wrote:
springparrot wrote:You've lived in the south, haven't you
HUH? You talkin' to me?
Yes, I have. Macon, GA (1988-89) & Memphis, TN (1989-1996).

One thing I'VE never heard a southerner say-
"Could you please get me a knife & fork so I can eat my fried chicken/pizza"

now that's pure blasphemy!

Those words shouldn't even be used in the same sentence!

(I'm telling Maggie on you!

)

Wino you know · Post by **Wino you know** » August 24, 2007 1:38 pm

Conolulu wrote:
Wino you know wrote:
springparrot wrote:You've lived in the south, haven't you
HUH? You talkin' to me?
Yes, I have. Macon, GA (1988-89) & Memphis, TN (1989-1996).

One thing I'VE never heard a southerner say-
"Could you please get me a knife & fork so I can eat my fried chicken/pizza"

now that's pure blasphemy!

Those words shouldn't even be used in the same sentence!

(I'm telling Maggie on you! )

Go ahead. Despite my size, I can run pretty fast.

Sorry-but the southerners got it right when they said FRIED CHICKEN AND PIZZA SHOULD BE EATEN WITH THE FINGERS!
To do otherwise warrants being placed before a firing squad.

IrishPirate · Post by **IrishPirate** » August 24, 2007 8:05 pm

aeroparrot · Post by **aeroparrot** » August 26, 2007 3:41 pm

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30 Things That You Will Never Hear A Southern Boy Say

30 Things That You Will Never Hear A Southern Boy Say

Re: 30 Things That You Will Never Hear A Southern Boy Say