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The BuffettNews BN CRITTERS FORUM. Since March, 2008, the home of threads where eyerolls are welcomed, and by damb golly, encouraged.
it's Deja vu all over again......isn't this strip very close to the first or 2nd strip ever done?
Reminds me of some graffitti someone spray painted on a Welcome to Vermont sign on the highway....when they were done the sign said "Welcome to Vermont - Please empty your wallets, turn around and go home"
C-Dawg wrote:it's Deja vu all over again......isn't this strip very close to the first or 2nd strip ever done?
Reminds me of some graffitti someone spray painted on a Welcome to Vermont sign on the highway....when they were done the sign said "Welcome to Vermont - Please empty your wallets, turn around and go home"
Wait until that poor dude finds out what those "nominal TicketB@st@rd fees" are.... And then JiveNation(which we all know is owned by TicketB@st@rd, or vice versa)charges him an additional $20.00 for "early access parking"¹, $9.50 for a glass of beer², and the as-yet-to-be-determined "porta-potty fee"³ when he gets there. -"BB"-
While researching *funny tourist sayings* for today's strip
(yes, I research things and actually put some thought into this - honest),
I stumbled across this .......
I am not sure how true these are.. but its a funny read…
These questions about South Africa were posted on a South African Tourism Website and were
apparently answered by the website owner (great sense of humor!).
Q: Does it ever get windy in South Africa ? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? ( UK )
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends how much you’ve been drinking.
Q: I want to walk from Durban to Cape Town – can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )
A: Sure, it’s only two thousand kilometres take lots of water…
Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in South Africa ? ( Sweden )
A: So it’s true what they say about Swedes…
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in South Africa ? Can you send me a list of them in JHB, Cape Town , Knysna and Jeffrey’s Bay? ( UK )
A: What did your last slave die of?
Q: Can you give me some information about Koala Bear racing in South Africa? ( USA )
A: Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the pacific. A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe which does not…oh forget it. Sure, the Koala Bear racing is every Tuesday night in Hillbrow. Come naked.
Q: Which direction is north in South Africa ? ( USA )
A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we’ll send the rest of the directions.
Q: Can I bring cutlery into South Africa ? ( UK )
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys’ Choir schedule? ( USA )
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is…oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Hillbrow, straight after the Koala Bear races. Come naked.
Q: Do you have perfume in South Africa ? ( France )
A: No, WE don ‘t stink.
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in South Africa ? ( USA )
A: Anywhere where a significant number of Americans gather.
Q: Can you tell me the regions in South Africa where the female population is smaller than the male population? ( Italy )
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in South Africa ? ( France )
A: Only at Christmas.
Q: Are there killer bees in South Africa ? ( Germany )
A: Not yet, but for you, we’ll import them.
Q: Are there supermarkets in Cape Town and is milk available all year round?
A: No, we are a peaceful civilisation of vegan hunter-gatherers. Milk is illegal.
Q: Please send a list of all doctors in South Africa who can di spense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca, which is where YOU come from. All South African snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.
Q: I was in South Africa in 1969, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Hillbrow. Can you help? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you will probably still have to pay her by the hour.
Q: Will I be able to speek English most places I go? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you’ll have to learn it first.
I don't care how many times you do them Ticketmaster jokes always resonate with BNers!
Every time I try to get tickets and get some really off the wall code words I swear I will remember them and post them, but since I'm always desperately "trying again" I usually don't remember them.
