Male/Female Definitions

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SMLCHNG
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Favorite Buffett Song: Tin Cup Chalice/Lovely Cruise
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Favorite Boat Drink: Rum Runner
Location: Castle Rock, CO

Male/Female Definitions

Post by SMLCHNG »

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:

40-ish................................49.
Adventurous......................Slept with everyone.
Athletic...............................No breasts.
Average looking....................Moooo.
Beautiful.............................Pathological liar.
Emotionally Secure................On medication.
Feminist................................Fat.
Free spirit............................Junkie.
Friendship first......................Former slut.
New-Age............................Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-fashioned.......................No oral.
Open-minded.......................Desperate.
Outgoing............................Loud and Embarrassing.
Professional..........................b****.
Voluptuous..........................Very Fat.
Large frame.........................Hugely Fat.
Wants Soul mate..................Stalker.

WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want
5. I am sorry = You'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = You're in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = You better not
8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later.
9. I am not upset = Of course, I am upset, you moron!
10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think
about?

MEN'S ENGLISH:
1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = Let's have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.
11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay

txaggirl91
Diamond as Big as The Ritz
Posts: 26937
Joined: January 27, 2006 5:44 pm
Number of Concerts: 30
Location: living for the day

Post by txaggirl91 »

too funny!
I must be wishing on someone else's star....

tdparrothead
Behind Door #3
Posts: 3576
Joined: December 11, 2002 1:33 pm
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Location: 400 miles from where I really wanna be...

Post by tdparrothead »

:lol: :lol: :lol:
"And now you’re here and the search comes to an end... I’ve found my long lost friend."

"In all his deepest dreams the Gypsy flies with sweet Melissa..."

George Strait in June, Kenny Chesney in July, and Jimmy Buffett in August... Looks like a Great Summer!!!

ragtopW
Last Man Standing
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Joined: December 18, 2001 7:00 pm
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Post by ragtopW »

:D :D :D :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :)

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