Laughter is the best medicine

[jeepgirl]

Doctor screw up's
A man comes into the ER and yells, "My wife's going to have her baby in the
cab!" I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress,
and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were
several cabs, and I was in the wrong one.

Dr. Mark MacDonald, San Antonio, TX
* * * * * * * * * * * * *

At the beginning of my shift, I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and
slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. "Big breaths," I
instructed. "Yes, they used to be," remorsefully replied the patient.

Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle, WA
* * * * * * * * * * * *

One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her
husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes
later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a
"massive internal fart."

Dr. Susan Steinberg, Manitoba, Canada
* * * * * * * * * *

I was performing a complete physical, including the visual acuity test. I
placed the patient twenty feet from the chart and began, "Cover your right
eye with your hand." He read the 20/20 line perfectly. "Now your left."
Again, a flawless read. "Now both," I requested. There was silence. He
couldn't even read the large E on the top line. I turned and discovered that
he had done exactly what I had asked; he was standing there with both his
eyes covered. I was laughing too hard to finish the exam.

Dr. Matthew Theodropolous, Worcester, MA
* * * * * * * * * * * * *

While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, "How long have
you been bedridden?" After a look of complete confusion she answered, "Why,
not for about twenty years -- when my husband was alive."

Dr. Steven Swanson, Corvallis, OR
* * * * * * * * * * *

I was caring for a woman from Kentucky and asked, "So, how's your breakfast
this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem
to get used to the taste," the patient replied. I then asked to see the
jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled "KY Jelly."

Dr. Leonard Kransdorf, Detroit, MI
* * * * * * * * * * * * *

And Finally . . . . .

A new, young MD doing his residency in OB was quite embarrassed performing
female pelvic exams. To cover his embarrassment he had unconsciously formed
a habit of whistling softly. The middle-aged lady upon whom he was
performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassed
him. He looked up from his work and sheepishly said, "I'm sorry. Was I
tickling you?" She replied, "No doctor, but the song you were whistling was
'I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Wiener'."

[SMLCHNG]

* * * * * * * * * * *

I was caring for a woman from Kentucky and asked, "So, how's your breakfast
this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem
to get used to the taste," the patient replied. I then asked to see the
jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled "KY Jelly."

Dr. Leonard Kransdorf, Detroit, MI
* * * * * * * * * * * * *

[Tiki Bar]

[FinsUp328]

[daddymention]

Those are very good!!!