Page 11 of 27

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:00 pm
by olemissbrad
balcony girls wrote:
olemissbrad wrote:And with that I'm outta here....
best thing you've said yet. . .

lookit, dude . .quietly leave the room now before we BN b*tches tear you up to the point that you crawl away with tears in your eyes, your thumb in your mouth and sh*t runnin' down your leg . . .

have a nice day . .

:wench:
I've dealt with the queen of assholes over at COBO. I assure you that I that you are nowhere up to her standard.

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:02 pm
by PHBeerman
olemissbrad wrote:
balcony girls wrote:
olemissbrad wrote:And with that I'm outta here....
best thing you've said yet. . .

lookit, dude . .quietly leave the room now before we BN b*tches tear you up to the point that you crawl away with tears in your eyes, your thumb in your mouth and sh*t runnin' down your leg . . .

have a nice day . .

:wench:
I've dealt with the queen of assholes over at COBO. I assure you that I that you are nowhere up to her standard.
HalJakeBrad have you not learned your lesson yet?

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:03 pm
by buffettbride
olemissbrad wrote:
balcony girls wrote:
olemissbrad wrote:And with that I'm outta here....
best thing you've said yet. . .

lookit, dude . .quietly leave the room now before we BN b*tches tear you up to the point that you crawl away with tears in your eyes, your thumb in your mouth and sh*t runnin' down your leg . . .

have a nice day . .

:wench:
I've dealt with the queen of assholes over at COBO. I assure you that I that you are nowhere up to her standard.
That notwithstanding, you are still a total p-rick. Why can't you just leave well enough alone? There's no purpose in being an a**hole for a**hole sake. Just knock it off.

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:03 pm
by Tiki Bar
balcony girls wrote:
Tiki Bar wrote:
balcony girls wrote:
olemissbrad wrote:And with that I'm outta here....
best thing you've said yet. . .

lookit, dude . .quietly leave the room now before we BN b*tches tear you up to the point that you crawl away with tears in your eyes, your thumb in your mouth and sh*t runnin' down your leg . . .

have a nice day . .

:wench:
:o
was that a godd :o . . . .or a bad :o . . . .

? ? ? ? ?

:o
a godd... as in a Tiki godd! :wink:

(it was actually an I'm askeered - the balcony girls are angry! :o )

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:05 pm
by mermaidindisguise
1. Jeb Bush can s*** my left t*t!!!!!

2. Balcony Girls Rule!~~~~

3. Q:What is the favorite movie of all the people trying to pro-long Terry's bedridden torture???

A: Heaven Can Wait


4. Where are all the little ladies who can read minds at? They could come in and tell us what Terry wants... Oh wait - they can't read a mind if there is not one there to read. Get it?

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:06 pm
by olemissbrad
My brand of comedy is like sushi...you either love it or hate it.

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:08 pm
by buffettbride
Just because something is funny to you doesn't make it comedy. Your little dick being the size of my pinkie, now that's comedy.

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:09 pm
by Lightning Bolt
olemissbrad wrote:My brand of comedy is like sushi...you either love it or hate it.
ONE VOTE: NOT LOVIN' IT :-?

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:10 pm
by olemissbrad
Jesus, that is just lame. Should of figured :-? :-? :roll: :roll:

BB, surely you can do better than steal the jokes off the Jerry Springer Show.

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:12 pm
by Tiki Bar
olemissbrad wrote:My brand of comedy is like sushi...you either love it or hate it.
Sushi must be really gross, and have bad taste then. :roll:

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:12 pm
by buffettbride
olemissbrad wrote:Jesus, that is just lame. Should of figured :-? :-? :roll: :roll:

BB, surely you can do better than steal the jokes off the Jerry Springer Show.
I thought you were leaving?

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:13 pm
by Tiki Bar
olemissbrad wrote:And with that I'm outta here....
you were saying?

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:14 pm
by olemissbrad
In recent years the quality of the American news media has declined to the point where I really only trust the news I get from the screaming hobos that call the back alleys of downtown home.

Something about their erudite voices, horse from yelling about the dangers of invisible satellites and government conspiracies, carries an air of absolute certainty that I find to be lacking from modern reporting. These people, in their hearts, simply know the truth. When I turn on the TV I see idiots rambling on about things that no self-respecting person should ever care about, like the Michael Jackson case. I realize that we are a stupid, feeble race soon to be devoured by giant worms, but it still burns my britches that more of us don't just exercise basic human decency and change the channel, triggering Nielson earthquakes that shock the foundations of television news in the process.


Even after dropping cable and spray-painting my TV screen black, I still hear far too much unpleasant and pointless news. Maybe it's the millions of fleshy proxies that repeat the boring news stories of the day or maybe the media has found a way to illegally broadcast news inside my head. I'm truly terrified that I'm still being poorly informed about things I do not care about while actively avoiding the news.

For the last couple weeks, the news anchor voices inside my head have been telling me about Terri Schiavo's valiant struggle against either living or not living, depending on who you ask. It seems this adorable human rock has created an epic tug of war between those who value prolonging a meaningless existence and those who favor murdering a sleeping beauty. Or vice versa, I don't remember.

I have to ask, why is this news? I could understand this being local news, but national news? And for this long? Some are saying this brings up an important topic long missing from the national spotlight. The problem is, what good is coming from it being in the national spotlight? All it's going to do is p*** off a bunch of people when a decision is made, then trigger more arguments that will ultimately dissolve into pure screaming rage from only the most fanatical of idiots on both sides of the debate. Hooray for that! I can't for the life of me figure out how in a world where millions of things happen on a daily basis, we always hear about the same 3 or 4 stories to the point where they go from being news to just being sappy drama played out for ratings. Terri Schiavo's getting so much attention you'd almost think she murdered Scott Peterson's wife and molested those kids at Michael Jackson's ranch.

I look at this from a more enlightened perspective. Terri Schiavo, for all intents and purposes, is a brain-eating zombie cursed with a lack if mobility. Now, a zombie's purpose in life is to consume non-zombie human brains while simultaneously spreading the zombie plague to non-zombie humans. Granted, I'm no Robert Frost, so my description of a zombie's life lacks a lot of eloquence and beauty, but trust me when I say it's something special. It's very much the path less traveled by. When you can't move, you can't very well take a bite out of somebody's head. So wanting to keep her "alive" in her current state is therefore rather heartless. What they should be doing, if they want her to reach her full potential, is work at getting her some kind of Stephen Hawking-like wheelchair rig with a special voice synthesizer to squeal "brrrraaiiinnns" when she drools on her little keyboard. But that's making a real circus out of what should be a private matter between the courts and family members, right?

I'm sure Terri Schiavo is a wonderful lady, but she's dead as far as living a real life is concerned. She isn't going to jump out of bed in some monumental Hulk Hogan-like second wind and body slam her husband. The time for that has long since expired. The sooner she passes away, the sooner everyone can move on and the sooner her immortal soul can crawl across the rainbow bridge and into the endless human abattoirs of zombie heaven. If we have magical feed tubes that can prolong a vacant life, let's hook up some extension tubes and plug them straight into a starving country like Ethiopia. Instead of wasting all this time focusing on one minor ping in the giant sonar of death and suffering, let's not lose sight of the bigger picture, which even uglier, bloodier, and features millions of dying people. Maybe, just maybe, there is a magical way some of those people could be helped instead of focusing solely on one brain-damaged vegetable kept alive through the medical science of denial.

Frankly, I'm more mystified at this feeding tube business than the fact that it's keeping someone alive. How long have we had the technology to pump food into people with tubes, and why has this technology been monopolized by the healthcare industry? I have to work hard to eat. I have to scour the kitchen like an animal for things that are edible, and many a time my searches turn up nothing. I would love for a doctor to jam a tube into my stomach and pump food through it. Not only would that save me the time of acquiring food, it would also save me the time of chewing food. I would love for food to be pumped into my disgusting body so that I can fulfill my fantasy of living entirely in bed and never having to work a day in my life again. Then, years later, when I die prematurely due to inactivity, I could fondly reflect on all the time I saved by not having to find food or chew it.

I just wouldn't want to exist as a brain-dead pile of meat living off the charity of a tube. What would even be the point of living that way? It's an awful situation for anyone to be in, but it's an awful situation that's not going to get better over time. There's no quality of life if you don't even know that you are alive, and there's no comprehension of that if your brain is like a sad potato. Let her and the dreadful media coverage of her non-life die already.

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:17 pm
by Tiki Bar
Hey gang, we've all been sucked in... and need to try to get back on topic.

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:22 pm
by ph4ever
buffettbride wrote:Just because something is funny to you doesn't make it comedy. Your little dick being the size of my pinkie, now that's comedy.

Mal please warn me when you're going to post something like this. I need a new keyboard, pants, panties and shoes!!!! :lol:

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:23 pm
by bravedave
olemissbrad wrote:In recent years ... Let her and the dreadful media coverage of her non-life die already.
:cry:
[sniff]
Pure f**** poetry
(I love you, man)






(but I still don't get the part about the horse)

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:23 pm
by buffettbride
ph4ever wrote:
buffettbride wrote:Just because something is funny to you doesn't make it comedy. Your little dick being the size of my pinkie, now that's comedy.

Mal please warn me when you're going to post something like this. I need a new keyboard, pants, panties and shoes!!!! :lol:
I promise :lol: :lol: :lol: But I still don't know what his little dick has to do with the Jerry Springer Show. Evidently they are related.

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:25 pm
by ph4ever
buffettbride wrote:
ph4ever wrote:
buffettbride wrote:Just because something is funny to you doesn't make it comedy. Your little dick being the size of my pinkie, now that's comedy.

Mal please warn me when you're going to post something like this. I need a new keyboard, pants, panties and shoes!!!! :lol:
I promise :lol: :lol: :lol: But I still don't know what his little dick has to do with the Jerry Springer Show. Evidently they are related.

Next on Jerry Springer - men with very little penis' having their asses kicked by the women of BN


JERRY JERRY JERRY JERRY

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:26 pm
by buffettbride
ph4ever wrote:
buffettbride wrote:
ph4ever wrote:
buffettbride wrote:Just because something is funny to you doesn't make it comedy. Your little dick being the size of my pinkie, now that's comedy.

Mal please warn me when you're going to post something like this. I need a new keyboard, pants, panties and shoes!!!! :lol:
I promise :lol: :lol: :lol: But I still don't know what his little dick has to do with the Jerry Springer Show. Evidently they are related.

Next on Jerry Springer - men with very little penis' having their asses kicked by the women of BN


JERRY JERRY JERRY JERRY
I wonder if we'd get good ratings.

Posted: March 23, 2005 4:28 pm
by MojosMama
Dammmit! Am I too late for the lynch mob? :-?