BuffettNews.com

Read and HEED, guys.
And for CHRIST'S SAKE, pay special attention to #68.

http://www.drunkard.com/issues/01-02/01 ... _rules.htm

Where do people find these things?

I love this!

"Beer makes you mellow. Tequila makes you felonious."

I say, 86 these rules!!!!!!

Rule 87#



Only Drunk Dial people who are far away and live in the
Time zone BEHIND you

These folks were in Denver this weekend..

Drunkards convene in Denver

I love this one.

66. Asking a bartender what beers are on tap when the handles are right in front of you is the equivalent of saying, “I'm an idiot.”

66. Asking a bartender what beers are on tap when the handles are right in front of you is the equivalent of saying, “I'm an idiot.”

In a tiny English pub I read the name on the tap handle and asked the bartender for one of them. He said, "That's the company that makes the handle."

There's more than one way to prove yourself an idiot.

This is great!!!

15. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she accepts, she still might not like you.

very good. rules to live by.

why are people so dumb that they need those rules anyway though!?

sassysweetntx wrote:This is great!!!

15. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she accepts, she still might not like you.

How well I know.

SMLCHNG wrote: These folks were in Denver this weekend..

Drunkards convene in Denver

I love this one.

66. Asking a bartender what beers are on tap when the handles are right in front of you is the equivalent of saying, “I'm an idiot.”

This group of people that run the website are all Denver area based. A great website, albeit controversial.

sassysweetntx wrote:This is great!!!

15. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she accepts, she still might not like you.

hehe yep!

but if she buys a drink she likes you. (this is definitely true for me)

iuparrothead wrote:very good. rules to live by.

why are people so dumb that they need those rules anyway though!?

See rule #86

MelliJellyBean wrote:

sassysweetntx wrote:This is great!!!

15. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she accepts, she still might not like you.

hehe yep!

but if she buys a drink she likes you. (this is definitely true for me)

What if she offers to take you to the bar on ladies night so she can get you all the free drinks you want? She is not really buying anything, but it's the thought. Right?

Quint wrote:

MelliJellyBean wrote:

sassysweetntx wrote:This is great!!!

15. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she accepts, she still might not like you.

hehe yep!

but if she buys a drink she likes you. (this is definitely true for me)

What if she offers to take you to the bar on ladies night so she can get you all the free drinks you want? She is not really buying anything, but it's the thought. Right?

see also: early dates with Q and DKD.

SMLCHNG wrote::...
Drunkards convene in Denver

Nice...do i hear RoadTrip

This one makes me laugh:
72. Never argue your tab at the end of the night. Remember, you're hammered and they’re sober. It's akin to a precocious five-year-old arguing the super-string theory with a physicist. 99.9% of the time you're wrong and either way you're going to come off as a jackass

24. After your sixth drink, do not look at yourself in the mirror. It will shake your confidence

This reminded me of a time at a company party in Cocoa Beach.
Although I was sh*tfaced I do remember going to the restroom, staggering in front of the mirror and talking to myself, trying to force sobriety:
"okay now, settle down, don't fall, or say any more things to further embarrass yourself, and most of all don't puke".
I went back to the party and told my buddy I had to go back to the room. The next morning he showed me a video of me puking in the toilet with the toilet seat sitting on my shoulders. AAAAAH good times!!
funny how toilets seem nasty but when you're drunk it's okay to hug them and let you hair dangle in the water

sonofabeach wrote:24. After your sixth drink, do not look at yourself in the mirror. It will shake your confidence

This reminded me of a time at a company party in Cocoa Beach.
Although I was sh*tfaced I do remember going to the restroom, staggering in front of the mirror and talking to myself, trying to force sobriety:
"okay now, settle down, don't fall, or say any more things to further embarrass yourself, and most of all don't puke".
I went back to the party and told my buddy I had to go back to the room. The next morning he showed me a video of me puking in the toilet with the toilet seat sitting on my shoulders. AAAAAH good times!!
funny how toilets seem nasty but when you're drunk it's okay to hug them and let you hair dangle in the water

ew.

MICHAEL, MICHAEL, MICHAEL!!!!!