Page 1 of 1

WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

Posted: February 24, 2006 10:25 am
by ToplessRideFL
------------------WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY-------------

1. AT LUNCH, SIT IN YOUR PARKED CAR WITH SUNGLASSES ON AND POINT A HAIRDRYER AT PASSING CARS. SEE IF THEY SLOW DOWN.


2. PAGE YOURSELF OVER THE INTERCOM. DON'T DISGUISE YOUR VOICE.


3. EVERY TIME SOMEONE ASKS YOU TO DO SOMETHING, ASK IF THEY WANT FRIES WITH THAT.


4. PUT YOUR GARBAGE CAN ON YOUR DESK AND LABEL IT "IN"


5. WHEN TRYING ON CLOTHES IN A DRESSING ROOM, YELL OUT "THERE IS NO
TOILET PAPER IN HERE"


6. IN THE MEMO FIELD OF ALL YOUR CHECKS, WRITE "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS"


7. FINISH ALL YOUR SENTENCES WITH "IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PROPHECY"


8. DONT USE PUNCTUATION


9. AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE, SKIP RATHER THAN WALK!


10. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THRU ORDER IS "TO GO" .

11. SING ALONG AT T! HE OPERA .


12. GO TO A POETRY RECITAL AND ASK WHY THE POEMS DON'T RHYME .


13. PUT MOSQUITO NETTING AROUND YOUR WORK AREA AND PLAY TROPICAL SOUNDS ALL DAY.


14. WHEN THE MONEY COMES OUT THE ATM, SCREAM "I WON I WON!"


15. WHEN LEAVING THE ZOO, START RUNNING TOWARDS THE PARKING LOT,
YELLING "RUN FOR YOUR LIVES THEY'RE LOOSE!"


16. TELL YOUR CHILDREN OVER DINNER, "DUE TO THE ECONOMY, WE ARE GOING TO LET ONE OF YOU GO."

Posted: February 24, 2006 10:27 am
by springparrot
We already have people that do #8 and #13 :wink:

Re: WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

Posted: February 24, 2006 10:29 am
by sy
ToplessRideFL wrote: 2. PAGE YOURSELF OVER THE INTERCOM. DON'T DISGUISE YOUR VOICE.

3. EVERY TIME SOMEONE ASKS YOU TO DO SOMETHING, ASK IF THEY WANT FRIES WITH THAT.

4. PUT YOUR GARBAGE CAN ON YOUR DESK AND LABEL IT "IN"

6. IN THE MEMO FIELD OF ALL YOUR CHECKS, WRITE "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS"

10. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THRU ORDER IS "TO GO" .
I've actually done the above....several times.....guess I'm well on my way to a healthy level of insanity... :D :D :D

Posted: February 24, 2006 10:32 am
by ToplessRideFL
I thought some of them were hysterical..... I am bringing a hair dryer to work next week! :wink:

Re: WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

Posted: February 24, 2006 10:35 am
by comemonday
ToplessRideFL wrote:
10. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THRU ORDER IS "TO GO" .
You actually have to do that at our Dairy Queen. I can see not knowing when I'm ordering that I'm the only one in the car, but once I pull up and they start handing me out blizzards and sundaes w/out lids.... :roll: (I always ask everyone I know--well, at least my nearby family!-- if they want anything from the DQ when I'm going... for some reason.)

Re: WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

Posted: February 24, 2006 10:36 am
by psychjava
2. PAGE YOURSELF OVER THE INTERCOM. DON'T DISGUISE YOUR VOICE.

3. EVERY TIME SOMEONE ASKS YOU TO DO SOMETHING, ASK IF THEY WANT FRIES WITH THAT.

4. PUT YOUR GARBAGE CAN ON YOUR DESK AND LABEL IT "IN"

8. DONT USE PUNCTUATION

9. AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE, SKIP RATHER THAN WALK!

10. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THRU ORDER IS "TO GO" .

14. WHEN THE MONEY COMES OUT THE ATM, SCREAM "I WON I WON!"
done all of these at some point! :-?
13. PUT MOSQUITO NETTING AROUND YOUR WORK AREA AND PLAY TROPICAL SOUNDS ALL DAY.
will do this on Monday 8)

Re: WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

Posted: February 24, 2006 10:50 am
by Midnight Flyer
comemonday wrote:
ToplessRideFL wrote:
10. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THRU ORDER IS "TO GO" .
You actually have to do that at our Dairy Queen. I can see not knowing when I'm ordering that I'm the only one in the car, but once I pull up and they start handing me out blizzards and sundaes w/out lids.... :roll: (I always ask everyone I know--well, at least my nearby family!-- if they want anything from the DQ when I'm going... for some reason.)
They ask that at In-N-Out here in SoCal too. If it's not to go and you're going to eat it in your car they give you a "lap mat" :lol: 8)

Re: WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

Posted: February 24, 2006 11:26 am
by rsgeist
sy wrote:
ToplessRideFL wrote: 2. PAGE YOURSELF OVER THE INTERCOM. DON'T DISGUISE YOUR VOICE.

3. EVERY TIME SOMEONE ASKS YOU TO DO SOMETHING, ASK IF THEY WANT FRIES WITH THAT.

4. PUT YOUR GARBAGE CAN ON YOUR DESK AND LABEL IT "IN"

6. IN THE MEMO FIELD OF ALL YOUR CHECKS, WRITE "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS"

10. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THRU ORDER IS "TO GO" .
I've actually done the above....several times.....guess I'm well on my way to a healthy level of insanity... :D :D :D
Yeah, and I got a really strange look from the teller when I cashed that check! :o

Posted: February 24, 2006 11:32 am
by phjrsaunt
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Re: WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

Posted: February 24, 2006 11:50 am
by SharkOnLand
Midnight Flyer wrote:
comemonday wrote:
ToplessRideFL wrote:
10. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THRU ORDER IS "TO GO" .
You actually have to do that at our Dairy Queen. I can see not knowing when I'm ordering that I'm the only one in the car, but once I pull up and they start handing me out blizzards and sundaes w/out lids.... :roll: (I always ask everyone I know--well, at least my nearby family!-- if they want anything from the DQ when I'm going... for some reason.)
They ask that at In-N-Out here in SoCal too. If it's not to go and you're going to eat it in your car they give you a "lap mat" :lol: 8)
If it's not to go, do you just sit in the car there in the drive-thru and eat it?

Re: WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

Posted: February 24, 2006 12:16 pm
by rednekkPH
rsgeist wrote:
sy wrote:
ToplessRideFL wrote: 2. PAGE YOURSELF OVER THE INTERCOM. DON'T DISGUISE YOUR VOICE.

3. EVERY TIME SOMEONE ASKS YOU TO DO SOMETHING, ASK IF THEY WANT FRIES WITH THAT.

4. PUT YOUR GARBAGE CAN ON YOUR DESK AND LABEL IT "IN"

6. IN THE MEMO FIELD OF ALL YOUR CHECKS, WRITE "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS"

10. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THRU ORDER IS "TO GO" .
I've actually done the above....several times.....guess I'm well on my way to a healthy level of insanity... :D :D :D
Yeah, and I got a really strange look from the teller when I cashed that check! :o
She was just amazed that somebody would actually pay you for sex. :lol:

Re: WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

Posted: February 24, 2006 12:31 pm
by buffettbride
rednekkPH wrote:
rsgeist wrote:
sy wrote:
ToplessRideFL wrote: 2. PAGE YOURSELF OVER THE INTERCOM. DON'T DISGUISE YOUR VOICE.

3. EVERY TIME SOMEONE ASKS YOU TO DO SOMETHING, ASK IF THEY WANT FRIES WITH THAT.

4. PUT YOUR GARBAGE CAN ON YOUR DESK AND LABEL IT "IN"

6. IN THE MEMO FIELD OF ALL YOUR CHECKS, WRITE "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS"

10. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THRU ORDER IS "TO GO" .
I've actually done the above....several times.....guess I'm well on my way to a healthy level of insanity... :D :D :D
Yeah, and I got a really strange look from the teller when I cashed that check! :o
She was just amazed that somebody would actually pay you for sex. :lol:
Heck, I think the check I wrote ya for the Nissan tix last year was written for sexual favors. :oops:

Re: WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

Posted: February 24, 2006 1:08 pm
by rsgeist
rednekkPH wrote:
rsgeist wrote:
sy wrote:
ToplessRideFL wrote: 2. PAGE YOURSELF OVER THE INTERCOM. DON'T DISGUISE YOUR VOICE.

3. EVERY TIME SOMEONE ASKS YOU TO DO SOMETHING, ASK IF THEY WANT FRIES WITH THAT.

4. PUT YOUR GARBAGE CAN ON YOUR DESK AND LABEL IT "IN"

6. IN THE MEMO FIELD OF ALL YOUR CHECKS, WRITE "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS"

10. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THRU ORDER IS "TO GO" .
I've actually done the above....several times.....guess I'm well on my way to a healthy level of insanity... :D :D :D
Yeah, and I got a really strange look from the teller when I cashed that check! :o
She was just amazed that somebody would actually pay you for sex. :lol:
Yeah, it's usually the other way around. And the checks have lots of numbers to the left of the decimal point. :roll: