much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have
never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into
bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel
like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look
by
saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in
the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed
department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several
different
very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her
we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes,
so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry
department
where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was
so
excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I
started
to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she
doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I
said,
"That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all
of the
excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think
this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel
like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
"WHAT?"
I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're
just not
in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your
shopping
needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to
kill me,
I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I
buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....
