The Hormone Hostage
Posted: October 26, 2006 4:56 pm
The Hormone Hostage
The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!
DANGEROUS:
What's for dinner?
Are you wearing that?
What are you so worked up about?
Should you be eating that?
What did you DO all day?
SAFER:
Can I help you with dinner?
Wow, you sure look good in brown!
Could we be overreacting?
You know, there are a lot of apples left.
I hope you didn't over-do it today.
SAFEST:
Where would you like to go for dinner?
WOW! Look at you!
Here's my paycheck.
Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?
I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRA SAFE:
Here, have some wine.
Here, have some wine
Here, have some wine.
Here, have some wine.
Here, have some more wine.
13 Things PMS Stands For:
1 Pass My Shotgun
2 Psychotic Mood Shift
3 Perpetual Munching Spree
4 Puffy Mid-Section
5 People Make me Sick
6 Provide Me with Sweets
7 Pardon My Sobbing
8 Pimples May Surface
9 Pass My Sweat pants
10. p*** Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men s***
12. Pack My Stuff
and my favorite one.
13. Potential Murder Suspect
Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a good laugh!
...Or men who need a warning.
And remember: Money talks .... but Chocolate SINGS!!!
The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!
DANGEROUS:
What's for dinner?
Are you wearing that?
What are you so worked up about?
Should you be eating that?
What did you DO all day?
SAFER:
Can I help you with dinner?
Wow, you sure look good in brown!
Could we be overreacting?
You know, there are a lot of apples left.
I hope you didn't over-do it today.
SAFEST:
Where would you like to go for dinner?
WOW! Look at you!
Here's my paycheck.
Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?
I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRA SAFE:
Here, have some wine.
Here, have some wine
Here, have some wine.
Here, have some wine.
Here, have some more wine.
13 Things PMS Stands For:
1 Pass My Shotgun
2 Psychotic Mood Shift
3 Perpetual Munching Spree
4 Puffy Mid-Section
5 People Make me Sick
6 Provide Me with Sweets
7 Pardon My Sobbing
8 Pimples May Surface
9 Pass My Sweat pants
10. p*** Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men s***
12. Pack My Stuff
and my favorite one.
13. Potential Murder Suspect
Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a good laugh!
...Or men who need a warning.
And remember: Money talks .... but Chocolate SINGS!!!
