Feel bad but need advice- how to rehome dogs?

vagabonded · Post by **vagabonded** » March 1, 2007 9:47 am

[RANT]I don't understand why so many people are being so aggressive and nasty. You mean to tell me nobody here has ever made a decision in their lives that they later found out wouldn't suit their lifestyle? Now I haven't been here very long but one draw to buffettnews for me is the support the members give eachother. Im sure no individual comes here to create problems and be told that they should have done something else. We don't have to log onto buffettnews to get reemed out by people. I'm sure it's a very hard decision to make to decide dogs arent right for you and I don't think everyones critisizing is making it any easier. Shes doing the most respectable thing she can by being honest and asking for advice on what the most appropriate and humane solution is here. The least we can do is respect her decision and try to help her go from here. Think of this as an AA meeting... when someone gets up to speak there and says I have a drinking problem, does everyone immedietly start screaming at them that theyre stupid and should have thought about that BEFORE they became an alcoholic? No, they work from where they are right now and look to be supportive and help make things better. I have 2 dogs and couldnt ever imagine being without them but it doesn't mean I'm going to be rude and nasty. [/END RANT]

Anyways, just my dos centavos.

Good luck coconuts and I hope you find them a good home. I'm sure they enjoyed the time they spend with you.

sunseeker · Post by **sunseeker** » March 1, 2007 10:32 am

I agree Dave, some people are being way to harsh on Coconuts. She is making a decision that I'm sure has been a difficult one. And she clearly is going to make sure they go to a good home....people in my part of the world would leave a dog to die in the back yard, shoot it, or set it out on the side of the road. Those are the people that deserve our backlash....

Dally · Post by **Dally** » March 1, 2007 10:45 am

I didn't mean to sound harsh......it just struck a nerve with all the "hate" she obviously has for the dogs.

I commend her for being honest and looking for a nice and decent home for the dogs instead of just giving them to any Tom, Dick, or Harry.

comemonday · Post by **comemonday** » March 1, 2007 10:49 am

sunseeker wrote:I agree Dave, some people are being way to harsh on Coconuts. She is making a decision that I'm sure has been a difficult one. And she clearly is going to make sure they go to a good home....people in my part of the world would leave a dog to die in the back yard, shoot it, or set it out on the side of the road. Those are the people that deserve our backlash....

Me too.

ph4ever · Post by **ph4ever** » March 1, 2007 11:08 am

This is an example of the complete need to research any type of "commitment" you are getting into. Some people are all animal type of people - they can accept and handle the responsibility of any animal. Some are not - does that make them bad pet owners. Not necessarily - Coconuts is just not the type of person for a dog.

Coconuts, I'm really not wanting to blast you but it looks as if you did not thoroughly research the lab breed so we can all learn from your mistake.

Labs are "kids" for a long time. I have a lab/blue healer mix which means I have a hard headed kid that is highly intelligent. And I can honestly say there's no better feeling in the world than when, on a cold night, she jumps on my bed and curls up next to me to keep me warm. Or when she settles in with her head on my lap and sighs. And the sweetest thing is when she and my cat nap together.

As far as not being able to take trips?? Come on - who are you kidding? My dog travels great and loves to go camping and to visit friends (dog friendly homes of course) I've taken her to the sandcastle competition at Cannon Beach, OR and even to a restaurant where dogs were allowed on the porch. Yes there are times when she can't go on a trip - and at those times we take her to a nice boarding kennel in the country run by a couple that breeds dogs as well. The cost is really minimal.

Your recognizing that you made a mistake and willing to rectify it in a proper manner is something to commend. Your best bets are to first contact the woman you got them from. If she won't take them back then try a lab rescue group in your area.

I'm an Altered Boy · Post by **I'm an Altered Boy** » March 1, 2007 11:14 am

vagabonded wrote:I don't understand why so many people are being so aggressive and nasty.

Like you said, you haven't been here very long.

Indiana Jolly Mon · Post by **Indiana Jolly Mon** » March 1, 2007 11:15 am

I think a major problem is that she mentions the right thing to do would be to call the breeder she got them from to take them back, but then may not do it. Yes a mistake was made, and everyone makes them, but this one involves the dogs lives, and only dog lovers understand how important those are (and no need for any a-holes to sprout up here and say they are not as important as people, no one is saying that). So for the sake of the dogs the right thing needs to be done. She is not a bad person, but PLEASE do the right thing.

rednekkPH · Post by **rednekkPH** » March 1, 2007 11:16 am

ph4ever wrote:Labs are "kids" for a long time. I have a lab/blue healer mix which means I have a hard headed kid that is highly intelligent.

I've got a Lab/Weimarner mix...talk about a tazmanian devil

That said, I couldn't give her (or my more mild-mannered lab/husky mix) up for the world.

NanaBabe · Post by **NanaBabe** » March 1, 2007 11:17 am

Coconuts, ya know what ya NEED to do? Don't let others opinions sway your decision or get to you. I am shocked at the judgemental attitude in here!!!!

There is nothing wrong with making an at-the-time-correct decision, then finding out that the decision wasn't the right one after all. I suppose none of you have ever gotten a divorce??????

And to equate not wanting dogs with the inability to be a good parent???? Don't any of you have children and realize just how incredibly different that love is from any other love you have ever felt in your entire life??????

I am truly and absolutely mortified at the hatred shown to someone who was obviously trying to find the right way to handle a tough moral dilemma. I certainly know where NOT to ask for moral support! Thanks for the advance warning before I get too comfortable in here.

RinglingRingling · Post by **RinglingRingling** » March 1, 2007 11:17 am

I'm an Altered Boy wrote:
vagabonded wrote:I don't understand why so many people are being so aggressive and nasty.
Like you said, you haven't been here very long.

just wait until the next "Kenny Cheeseney is my hero" thread...

:D

ph4ever · Post by **ph4ever** » March 1, 2007 11:20 am

rednekkPH wrote:
ph4ever wrote:Labs are "kids" for a long time. I have a lab/blue healer mix which means I have a hard headed kid that is highly intelligent.
I've got a Lab/Weimarner mix...talk about a tazmanian devil

That said, I couldn't give her (or my more mild-mannered lab/husky mix) up for the world.

I chase mine daily to get something she has snatched away from her. Cigarettes, water bottle, lighter, remote, house slipper. And I can't count the number of times I yell "Bailey get the cat's head out of your mouth" She even snatched up one of my parakeets and all I saw was her tail feathers sticking out her mouth. (the bird is ok) Yea she's a handful but also a joy. She thinks she's a lap dog - she'll climb in my lap for some quality mom time.

green1 · Post by **green1** » March 1, 2007 11:21 am

Call the breeder. If it is a good breeder they will take them back no matter how long it has been.

Indiana Jolly Mon · Post by **Indiana Jolly Mon** » March 1, 2007 11:21 am

NanaBabe, your point of people jumping on her for the children comment is because I am sure those people are like me and know people that have kids and "dont let them get in their way of living their lives". If you dont like your house messy, dont like having to be home at a certian time or want to just spontaneously go away for weekends, kids are not for you. And not having kids doesnt make someone a bad person, I applaud those who admit they dont want kids over those that do and refuse to make them their priority.

bravedave · Post by **bravedave** » March 1, 2007 11:22 am

I fail to see how any amount of "research" can foretell a bad match between a willing dog owner and a pair of pooches. Some things can not be explained but only learned by experience. I commend anyone who is willing to give the experience a try, as opposed to someone who is too scared to attempt something they are interested in.

[my bad -- too slow. another poster beat me to the "divorce" punch]

rednekkPH · Post by **rednekkPH** » March 1, 2007 11:22 am

ph4ever wrote: She thinks she's a lap dog - she'll climb in my lap for some quality mom time.

Both of our dogs (80 and 60 pounds) ARE lap dogs...Christine and I were not given a choice in the matter. They are also bed dogs.

ph4ever · Post by **ph4ever** » March 1, 2007 11:33 am

NanaBabe wrote:Coconuts, ya know what ya NEED to do? Don't let others opinions sway your decision or get to you. I am shocked at the judgemental attitude in here!!!!

There is nothing wrong with making an at-the-time-correct decision, then finding out that the decision wasn't the right one after all. I suppose none of you have ever gotten a divorce??????

And to equate not wanting dogs with the inability to be a good parent???? Don't any of you have children and realize just how incredibly different that love is from any other love you have ever felt in your entire life??????

I am truly and absolutely mortified at the hatred shown to someone who was obviously trying to find the right way to handle a tough moral dilemma. I certainly know where NOT to ask for moral support! Thanks for the advance warning before I get too comfortable in here.

I'd like to address two of your statements - I have a son and I have a dog. My son was raised with dogs as family members. Not pets - but family members. There is a difference in the love however the love of both is extremely intense - my pets are in essence my kids because I took that responsibility and made them a part of my family. It's really safe to say that if anyone messes with my pets or my kid they'll have hell to pay.

As far as moral support - you can't expect anyone to completely back you in moral decisions now can you? That's a fairy tale world that does not exist here or anywhere. I have received excellent support here when needed - I also got back stabbed, blasted, belittled - you name it. You've got to take the bad with the good because it's everywhere. Some places the bad is more prevalent than here.

NanaBabe · Post by **NanaBabe** » March 1, 2007 11:35 am

Indiana Jolly Mon wrote:NanaBabe, your point of people jumping on her for the children comment is because I am sure those people are like me and know people that have kids and "dont let them get in their way of living their lives". If you dont like your house messy, dont like having to be home at a certian time or want to just spontaneously go away for weekends, kids are not for you. And not having kids doesnt make someone a bad person, I applaud those who admit they dont want kids over those that do and refuse to make them their priority.

I disagree with you on this too. You can still be a great parent without liking that kids are messy and without being the one in charge of them 24/7. Letting other family members (and in some cases friends) share in the raising of your children by being responsible for them at times, so parents CAN have a life that is not totally absorbed by their children, is wonderful for the children. They have more varied life experiences and the joy that can come from having an active grandparent/grandchild relationship is immeasurable. There are many very successful family situations that don't come anywhere near the supermom version.

vagabonded · Post by **vagabonded** » March 1, 2007 11:39 am

I'm an Altered Boy wrote:
vagabonded wrote:I don't understand why so many people are being so aggressive and nasty.
Like you said, you haven't been here very long.

Do you mean that in seriousness? I tried to bite my tounge at this whole situation but seriously, what kind of premise does this set for other people who ask for support making difficult situations in their lives? I can promise that as long as I'm here I will not attack someone for realizing down the line that they made a decision that didn't agree with their lifestyle.

vagabonded · Post by **vagabonded** » March 1, 2007 11:41 am

by the way....

vagabonded · Post by **vagabonded** » March 1, 2007 11:43 am

ph4ever wrote:
NanaBabe wrote:Coconuts, ya know what ya NEED to do? Don't let others opinions sway your decision or get to you. I am shocked at the judgemental attitude in here!!!!

There is nothing wrong with making an at-the-time-correct decision, then finding out that the decision wasn't the right one after all. I suppose none of you have ever gotten a divorce??????

And to equate not wanting dogs with the inability to be a good parent???? Don't any of you have children and realize just how incredibly different that love is from any other love you have ever felt in your entire life??????

I am truly and absolutely mortified at the hatred shown to someone who was obviously trying to find the right way to handle a tough moral dilemma. I certainly know where NOT to ask for moral support! Thanks for the advance warning before I get too comfortable in here.
I'd like to address two of your statements - I have a son and I have a dog. My son was raised with dogs as family members. Not pets - but family members. There is a difference in the love however the love of both is extremely intense - my pets are in essence my kids because I took that responsibility and made them a part of my family. It's really safe to say that if anyone messes with my pets or my kid they'll have hell to pay.

As far as moral support - you can't expect anyone to completely back you in moral decisions now can you? That's a fairy tale world that does not exist here or anywhere. I have received excellent support here when needed - I also got back stabbed, blasted, belittled - you name it. You've got to take the bad with the good because it's everywhere. Some places the bad is more prevalent than here.

Doesnt make it right or comforting anywhere though...

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Feel bad but need advice- how to rehome dogs?

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