Page 1 of 1

BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN

Posted: July 6, 2007 9:20 am
by britparrothead

BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN


1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.

2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.

3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.
_____________________________________________________
Preparing for the Birth:

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.

2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't' t do a thing

3rd baby : You ask for an epidural in your eighth month
______________________________________________________
The Layette :

1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.

2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.

3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?
______________________________________________________
Worries:

1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby.

2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.

3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing
______________________________________________________
Pacifier:

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and
wash and boil it.

2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.

3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
______________________________________________________
Diapering:

1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.

2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.

3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
______________________________________________________
Activities:

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.

2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.

3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.
______________________________________________________
Going Out:

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, yo u call home five times.

2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.

3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.
______________________________________________________
At Home:

1st baby : You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.

2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.

3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.
______________________________________________________
Swallowing Coins (a favorite):

1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays.

2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.

3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!

Posted: July 6, 2007 1:06 pm
by redwinemaker
:lol: :lol:

Posted: July 6, 2007 4:13 pm
by Y-NO-9-O
Yeah, but being the fourth child, this is my life:

1st child: 25 albums, tons of pictures, hours of videos, 35mm slideshow carousels (remember those?)
2nd child: 15 albums, lots of pictures, a couple videos, some 35mm slides
3rd child: 2 albums containing alot of pictures with 3 children, twelve 35mm slides
4th child (me): 1 fricking slide (which my mother would always announce "He just peed his pants in this picture")

And before any smart a$$es speak up, I was a baby in that d@mn picture!

Posted: July 6, 2007 4:45 pm
by Snowparrot
Y-NO-9-O wrote:Yeah, but being the fourth child, this is my life:

1st child: 25 albums, tons of pictures, hours of videos, 35mm slideshow carousels (remember those?)
2nd child: 15 albums, lots of pictures, a couple videos, some 35mm slides
3rd child: 2 albums containing alot of pictures with 3 children, twelve 35mm slides
4th child (me): 1 fricking slide (which my mother would always announce "He just peed his pants in this picture")

And before any smart a$$es speak up, I was a baby in that d@mn picture!
As the mother of 4, I can confirm that the amount of film used declines with the number of children, but the youngest stayed home longer than the others, so we have lots more beautiful teenager/young adult photos of her!

Posted: July 6, 2007 5:31 pm
by ragtopW
:o :o :D :D