FRIENDS VS. "SOUTHERN" FRIENDS

Joetown Parrothead · Post by **Joetown Parrothead** » August 4, 2008 5:07 pm

FRIENDS VS. "SOUTHERN" FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Always bring the food. And lots of it.

FRIENDS: Will say "hello".
SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Will give you a big hug and a kiss.
More than one.

FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.
SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Call your parents Mom and Dad, and
often.

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Cry with you. And for you .

FRIENDS: Will eat at your dinner table and leave.
SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Will spend hours there, talking,
laughing, and just being together.Then do the dishes
before leaving.

FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.
SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Could write a book with direct quotes
from you.And most of the time know you better than you do yourself.

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is
doing.
SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds' back-ends
that left you.Then walk beside you in the front of the crowd.

FRIENDS: Would knock on your door.
SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, "Are you home?"
If you are not home they will wait.

FRIENDS: Are for a while.
SOUTHREN FRIENDS: Are for life. And then some.

FRIENDS: Might ignore this.
SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Will forward this to all their Southern
Friends Without hesitation

I have been Blessed with SOUTHERN FRIENDS and you all are great!

ph4ever · Post by **ph4ever** » August 4, 2008 5:26 pm

I've got something similiar, only it's about Texas friends

To all my kick-ass Texas friends!!!!

FRIENDS: Tell you not to do something stupid when drunk

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will shine a spotlight on you while your drunk naked a$$ is taking a pi$$ in the bushes.

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FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Call your parents drunk as hell and tell them about the fat chick you tried to pick up

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FRIENDS: Hope the night out drinking goes smoothly, and hope that no one is late for the ride home.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Know some wild shi! will happen, and set up rally points.

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FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will be sitting next to you saying, Damn...that shi! was fun "

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FRIENDS: Cry with you.

TEXAS FRIENDS: laugh at you

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FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Steal each other's stuff so often nobody remembers who bought it in the first place.

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FRIENDS: Are happy that someone picked up a one night stand and leave them alone.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will Crawl naked into the room with a camera and hope for the tag team.

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FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Could write a book with direct quotes from you.

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FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds a$$ that left you.

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FRIENDS: Would knock on your door.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Walk right in and help them selves to your beer".

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FRIENDS: Will try and talk to the bouncer when you get tossed out of the bar.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will buck up and go after the bouncer for touching you on the way out.

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FRIENDS: Will wish you had enough money to go out that night, and are sorry you couldn't come.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will share their last dollar with you, drag you along, and try to work the bartender for free drinks all night.

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FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "You better drink the rest of that shi!, you know we don't waste. That's alcohol abuse!!!" HAHAHAHA !!!!

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FRIENDS: Want the money they loaned you back next week.

TEXAS Friends: Can't begin to remember who owes who money after taking care of each other for so long.

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FRIENDS: Will say "I can't handle Tequila anymore".

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will say "okay, just one more..." and then 2 minutes later "okay, just one more!".

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FRIENDS: Will talk shi! to the person who talks shi! about you.

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will knock them the F**K out!!

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FRIENDS: Will tell you "They'd take a bullet for you."

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will actually take a bullet for you.

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FRIENDS: Will ignore this

TEXAS FRIENDS: Will re-send this to ALL of their KICKASS TEXAS friends!!!

Wino you know · Post by **Wino you know** » August 4, 2008 6:17 pm

In the name of all that is holy, I make this statement in the presence of God Allmighty:
Us Yankees had better hope and pray every night that there is never EVER another civil war in this country, for, should there ever be one, the South will kick our a$$es to hell and back 6 million times before breakfast.

I mean, HELL, you come up north and what do you see?
A bunch of Prissssssssy Ivy League bafoons named Chip, Bif, and Prudence eating pizza and fried chicken with a FORK. WITH A G.D. FORK!

And after that they sit around and drink their ice tea from a friggin' MAYONAISE JAR!

And I'm supposed to go into COMBAT with these idiots if there's another civil war?
IN A PIG'S A$$!
I'll be getting MY overly ample okole to Texas just as fast as humanly possibe, whereupon I will humbly and greatfully declare my citizenship.

dnw · Post by **dnw** » August 4, 2008 6:26 pm

ph4ever · Post by **ph4ever** » August 4, 2008 6:59 pm

for several years, I don't know why but I've thought Garry liked Texas

blowinupinmissoula · Post by **blowinupinmissoula** » August 4, 2008 7:46 pm

or out west: where it doesnt seem like its a big deal what capacity the friendship is, simply being friends is fine. no measurement needed....

couldnt resist, as long as were talking about geographic areas of the country

Wino you know · Post by **Wino you know** » August 5, 2008 12:22 pm

ph4ever wrote:for several years, I don't know why but I've thought Garry liked Texas

You're wrong.
I DON'T like Texas.

I LOVE & worship Texas and anything Texan.

pair8head · Post by **pair8head** » August 5, 2008 1:29 pm

At the risk of causing some of you to be upset,

I didn't see anything on the "Southern friend" side of the story that doesn't apply to the friends I grew up with in the Pacific Northwest.

ph4ever · Post by **ph4ever** » August 5, 2008 1:43 pm

pair8head wrote:At the risk of causing some of you to be upset,

I didn't see anything on the "Southern friend" side of the story that doesn't apply to the friends I grew up with in the Pacific Northwest.

I'll deal with you when I get home........

VanillaGrl · Post by **VanillaGrl** » August 5, 2008 2:00 pm

ph4ever wrote:
pair8head wrote:At the risk of causing some of you to be upset,

I didn't see anything on the "Southern friend" side of the story that doesn't apply to the friends I grew up with in the Pacific Northwest.
I'll deal with you when I get home........

OMFG!!!!!!

Connie, you freakin' kill me girl!!!!! I swear I just literally laughed OUT FREAKIN' LOUD... and being that it is extremely quiet around here today...

You need to git yer a$$ back to Texas where you belong.... and okay...you can bring Don too.

buffettbride · Post by **buffettbride** » August 5, 2008 2:01 pm

i love my connie mom.

VanillaGrl · Post by **VanillaGrl** » August 5, 2008 2:01 pm

Wino you know wrote:
ph4ever wrote:for several years, I don't know why but I've thought Garry liked Texas
You're wrong.
I DON'T like Texas.

I LOVE & worship Texas and anything Texan.

Wino you know · Post by **Wino you know** » August 5, 2008 2:03 pm

VanillaGrl wrote:
OMFG!!!!!!

Connie, you freakin' kill me girl!!!!! I swear I just literally laughed OUT FREAKIN' LOUD... and being that it is extremely quiet around here today...

You need to git yer a$$ back to Texas where you belong.... and okay...you can bring Don too.

Bring Garry with you too.

ph4ever · Post by **ph4ever** » August 5, 2008 2:14 pm

Wino you know wrote:
VanillaGrl wrote:
OMFG!!!!!!

Connie, you freakin' kill me girl!!!!! I swear I just literally laughed OUT FREAKIN' LOUD... and being that it is extremely quiet around here today...

You need to git yer a$$ back to Texas where you belong.... and okay...you can bring Don too.
Bring Garry with you too.

I have to bring Lulu too - she's already told me I might as well buy a duplex when I move back

flyboy55 · Post by **flyboy55** » August 5, 2008 2:39 pm

Wino you know wrote:
VanillaGrl wrote:
OMFG!!!!!!

Connie, you freakin' kill me girl!!!!! I swear I just literally laughed OUT FREAKIN' LOUD... and being that it is extremely quiet around here today...

You need to git yer a$$ back to Texas where you belong.... and okay...you can bring Don too.
Bring Garry with you too.

Wait a few months and you can take George with you, too. (and please don't let him out again)

ph4ever · Post by **ph4ever** » August 5, 2008 3:01 pm

flyboy55 wrote:
Wino you know wrote:
VanillaGrl wrote:
OMFG!!!!!!

Connie, you freakin' kill me girl!!!!! I swear I just literally laughed OUT FREAKIN' LOUD... and being that it is extremely quiet around here today...

You need to git yer a$$ back to Texas where you belong.... and okay...you can bring Don too.
Bring Garry with you too.
Wait a few months and you can take George with you, too. (and please don't let him out again)

Who the hell is george??

oph · Post by **oph** » August 5, 2008 3:22 pm

ph4ever wrote:
flyboy55 wrote:
Wino you know wrote:
VanillaGrl wrote:
OMFG!!!!!!

Connie, you freakin' kill me girl!!!!! I swear I just literally laughed OUT FREAKIN' LOUD... and being that it is extremely quiet around here today...

You need to git yer a$$ back to Texas where you belong.... and okay...you can bring Don too.
Bring Garry with you too.
Wait a few months and you can take George with you, too. (and please don't let him out again)
Who the hell is george??

Dubya would be my guess

ph4ever · Post by **ph4ever** » August 5, 2008 3:31 pm

oph wrote:
ph4ever wrote:
flyboy55 wrote:
Wino you know wrote:
VanillaGrl wrote:
OMFG!!!!!!

Connie, you freakin' kill me girl!!!!! I swear I just literally laughed OUT FREAKIN' LOUD... and being that it is extremely quiet around here today...

You need to git yer a$$ back to Texas where you belong.... and okay...you can bring Don too.
Bring Garry with you too.
Wait a few months and you can take George with you, too. (and please don't let him out again)
Who the hell is george??
Dubya would be my guess

oh that george - Texans voted him in office to get him out of the state

And george could pay me all the money he had and he still wouldn't be able to travel with me

JustDucky · Post by **JustDucky** » August 11, 2008 8:17 pm

I like Texas - except Houston. What a waste.

I have a t-shirt that says Somewhere in Texas a village is missing its idiot.

Ha ha.

phjrsaunt · Post by **phjrsaunt** » August 11, 2008 8:22 pm

JustDucky wrote:I like Texas - except Houston. What a waste.

I have a t-shirt that says Somewhere in Texas a village is missing its idiot.

Ha ha.

How phunny you should single out Houston. Some of the most creative and generally wonderphul people I have ever met live there.