How much gas do you have?

ph4ever · Post by **ph4ever** » October 1, 2008 3:52 pm

Man gets burned while using lighter to siphon gas

Police said the man tried to siphon the gas with help from another woman, but he couldn't see how much gas was in the container, so he used the lighter to check.

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pbans · Post by **pbans** » October 1, 2008 3:55 pm

We had something like that happen when I was copping.....
Guy was in the parking lot of a bar....siphoned gas out of a car in to his....spilled gas down the front of himself....lit a cigarette shortly thereafter....burned his junk.

The suspect was easily identified as the man with the flaming penis.

rednekkPH · Post by **rednekkPH** » October 1, 2008 3:56 pm

pbans wrote:We had something like that happen when I was copping.....
Guy was in the parking lot of a bar....siphoned gas out of a car in to his....spilled gas down the front of himself....lit a cigarette shortly thereafter....burned his junk.

The suspect was easily identified as the man with the flaming penis.

I'm guessing you heard him long before you saw him...

Dezdmona · Post by **Dezdmona** » October 1, 2008 3:56 pm

ph4ever wrote:How much gas do you have?

Not so bad today, but you wouldn't have wanted to be around me yesterday.

LIPH · Post by **LIPH** » October 1, 2008 3:57 pm

Hey Bubba, hold my beer

buffettbride · Post by **buffettbride** » October 1, 2008 3:57 pm

Bean soup is for Thursdays.

Frank4 · Post by **Frank4** » October 1, 2008 3:59 pm

He'll be a finalist for the Darwin Awards real soon

pbans · Post by **pbans** » October 1, 2008 4:03 pm

rednekkPH wrote:
pbans wrote:We had something like that happen when I was copping.....
Guy was in the parking lot of a bar....siphoned gas out of a car in to his....spilled gas down the front of himself....lit a cigarette shortly thereafter....burned his junk.

The suspect was easily identified as the man with the flaming penis.
I'm guessing you heard him long before you saw him...

It was heinous.....the guy was an idiot, but I felt sorry for him.....
I think his name is Gladys now.

Mr Play · Post by **Mr Play** » October 1, 2008 4:03 pm

Watch him sue the owner of the van for parking it in a poorly lit area with limited visibility.

rednekkPH · Post by **rednekkPH** » October 1, 2008 4:08 pm

While not quite as idiotic as sticking a lighter into a gas tank, I came pretty close to removing myself from the gene pool in a similar manner a few years ago.

In a moment of what I can only call "disenlightenment", I tried to use a shop-vac to remove a washer I had dropped into the throat of a mounted carburetor. Basically, I had a 5 gallon sealed container full of gasoline vapor mounted to an electric motor. I think the largest piece of the canister I was able to find was maybe the size of a credit card. It's nothing short of amazing that I walked away with nothing more serious than a bunch of missing leg hair and some very minor shrapnel cuts.

krusin1 · Post by **krusin1** » October 1, 2008 4:30 pm

rednekkPH wrote:While not quite as idiotic as sticking a lighter into a gas tank, I came pretty close to removing myself from the gene pool in a similar manner a few years ago.

In a moment of what I can only call "disenlightenment", I tried to use a shop-vac to remove a washer I had dropped into the throat of a mounted carburetor. Basically, I had a 5 gallon sealed container full of gasoline vapor mounted to an electric motor. I think the largest piece of the canister I was able to find was maybe the size of a credit card. It's nothing short of amazing that I walked away with nothing more serious than a bunch of missing leg hair and some very minor shrapnel cuts.

citcat · Post by **citcat** » October 1, 2008 4:40 pm

Ok this thread made me go get one of these for my monitor:

bravedave · Post by **bravedave** » October 1, 2008 5:10 pm

Google: "ignosecond"

rich_big · Post by **rich_big** » October 1, 2008 5:22 pm

Dezdmona wrote:
ph4ever wrote:How much gas do you have?
Not so bad today, but you wouldn't have wanted to be around me yesterday.

well we know what would have happened with a lighter around you yesterday.....BLUEFLAME!!!!

RinglingRingling · Post by **RinglingRingling** » October 1, 2008 5:33 pm

Best James Earl Jones voice, "Ittttt buuuuuuhhrnnnnsss, when I peeeeeee"

Dutch Harbor PH · Post by **Dutch Harbor PH** » October 1, 2008 7:05 pm

Mr Play wrote:Watch him sue the owner of the van for parking it in a poorly lit area with limited visibility.

The sad thing is that he'd probably get awarded $millions.......

SchoolGirlHeart · Post by **SchoolGirlHeart** » October 1, 2008 7:32 pm

rednekkPH wrote:While not quite as idiotic as sticking a lighter into a gas tank, I came pretty close to removing myself from the gene pool in a similar manner a few years ago.

In a moment of what I can only call "disenlightenment", I tried to use a shop-vac to remove a washer I had dropped into the throat of a mounted carburetor. Basically, I had a 5 gallon sealed container full of gasoline vapor mounted to an electric motor. I think the largest piece of the canister I was able to find was maybe the size of a credit card. It's nothing short of amazing that I walked away with nothing more serious than a bunch of missing leg hair and some very minor shrapnel cuts.

Why would you rat yourself out like this??

j/k Frankie!! I'm going to hell.... I know..... But I couldn't help myself!

karat · Post by **karat** » October 1, 2008 7:51 pm

Seeing the title, I'm thinking Three Bean Salad.

After reading the well, tell-tale stories... brings to mind one

Years ago I worked for Holiday Inn as a Group Sales Manager, our Director of Sales was a complete idiot, I have no idea how he was able to walk this earth without tripping...

Long story short, he wrecked his car, I sent him over the hill to a friend that had a local car rental place. Upon returning a few days later, she said you have to bring it back with a full tank, there is a gas station down the street.

He came back and REAKED of gas...she asked what the hell happened!!! He said it spilled out...she asked if seeing the gasoline pouring from the tank was a hint he put too much in?!

He came back to the office and went outside to have a smoke........no, nothing happened, but no one was near him either!

TropicalTroubador · Post by **TropicalTroubador** » October 1, 2008 8:56 pm

RinglingRingling wrote:Best James Earl Jones voice, "Ittttt buuuuuuhhrnnnnsss, when I peeeeeee"

Apparently this happens so frequently that the Darwin Awards site either has, or is contemplating, disqualifying future instances of this particular type of genetic cleansing.

pinacolada lover · Post by **pinacolada lover** » October 2, 2008 3:04 am

Mr Play wrote:Watch him sue the owner of the van for parking it in a poorly lit area with limited visibility.