Signs, Signs Everywhere Signs

[~ Parrot Bay ~]

[CindaBee]

Fun! Top of the mornin' to you this fine St. Patrick's day!

[mikemck]

I wish I had a link to show you, but I'll never forget the day we went to the Phillies game back at the Vet and they flashed up on the screen, "IF YOU CAN'T READ THIS, CONTACT THE MAYOR'S COMMISION ON LITERACY (215)***-****".

[lminor26]

Or what about the sign at Mcdonalds that says "Braille Menus available upon reqiest." So how would the blind person be able to read that? I have another funny sign i took a pic of.

This was at a hotel in Gulf SHores last summer. They really take prayer seriously! I mean, I love Dippin Dots as much as anyone, but I can't see myself praying for them, lol.

[lminor26]

Here are some funny ones someone emailed me:

Anesthesiologist's business card:
When you care enough to sleep with the very best
**************************************
Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
'Dr Jones, at your cervix.'
**************************
In a Podiatrist's office:
'Time wounds all heels.'
**************************
On a Septic Tank Truck:
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
**************************
At a Proctologist's door:
'To expedite your visit please back in.'
**************************
On a Plumber's truck:
'We repair what your husband fixed.'
**************************
On another Plumber's truck:
'Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber..'
**************************
On a Church's Billboard:
'7 days without God makes one weak.'
**************************
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee :
'Invite us to your next blowout.'
**************************
At a Towing company:
'We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.'
**************************
On an Electrician's truck:
'Let us remove your shorts.'
**************************
In a Nonsmoking Area:
'If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.'
**************************
On a Maternity Room door:
'Push. Push. Push.'
**************************
At an Optometrist's Office:
'If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.'
**************************
On a Taxidermist's window:
'We really know our stuff.'
**************************
On a Fence:
'Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!'
**************************
At a Car Dealership:
'The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.'
**************************
Outside a Muffler Shop:
'No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.'
**************************
In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
'Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!'
**************************
At the Electric Company
'We would be delighted if you send in your payment.
However, if you don't, you will be'
**************************
In a Restaurant window:
'Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up.'
**************************
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
'Drive carefully. We'll wait.'
**************************
At a Propane Filling Station:
'Thank heaven for little grills.'
**************************
And don't forget the sign at a
Chicago
Radiator Shop:
'Best place in town to take a leak'

[LIBuffettFan]

Here's a few more...

1. Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary, we hear you coming."

2. Outside a hotel: "Help! We need inn-experienced people."

3. On a desk in a reception room: "We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left."

4. In a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes, Sit! Stay!"

5. At the electric company: "We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't, you will be."

6. On the door of a computer store: "Out for a quick byte."

7. In a restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry, come on in and get fed up."

8. Inside a bowling alley: "Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop."

9. In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully, we'll wait."

10. In a counselor's office: "Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional."

11. At Proctologists office: "Dr. Schmidt - Proctologist. Entrance in Rear"

[jimsig]

I have seen the "Fence Treated with Lubricant" signs. They are sometimes placed on railroad fences between track. They are placed where people are tempted to climb over the fence instead using the proper walkway. We actually had a woman call the railroad wanting her clothing replaced as it now had grease on it because she tried to climb over the fence. Needless to say the request was turned down.

[TropicalTroubador]

I saw a picture of one the other day that read, "Police station toilet stolen. Cops have nothing to go on."

[LIBuffettFan]

This is a good one...

[LIBuffettFan]

or this one...

[Bicycle Bill]

All I was going to say was that the picture of the seagull on the "no seagull" sign looks like it might have been Photoshopped. The lighting on the bird appears to be from a different source than the light on the sign, and the silhouette on the sign looks like it matches the silhouette of the bird just a little too precisely to be a coincidence. Also, seagulls have webbed feet and I don't think they could perch on a narrow sign; they usually are seen perched on flatter, wider surfaces like the tops of streetlights or pier pilings. But it's still funny!

-"BB"-

[~ Parrot Bay ~]

[anonymouse]

All I was going to say was that the picture of the seagull on the "no seagull" sign looks like it might have been Photoshopped. The lighting on the bird appears to be from a different source than the light on the sign, and the silhouette on the sign looks like it matches the silhouette of the bird just a little too precisely to be a coincidence. Also, seagulls have webbed feet and I don't think they could perch on a narrow sign; they usually are seen perched on flatter, wider surfaces like the tops of streetlights or pier pilings. But it's still funny!

-"BB"-

[Bfan53again]

Something for everybody..........thanks to all for sharing these great signs!